all day i have to try hard to remember things and to access my own mind... i can barely remember what i eat for dinner most night.. but as soon as i fall asleep i have these vivid dreams where it seems like all the things i registered from my day come forward... but as soon as i wake up i can only remember bits and peices... though sometimes i remember almost all of the dream... i had been feeling better. then i got off track with my birth control and all hell broke loose in my mind and the numb feeling that never completly goes away got like ten times worse... and i have begun feeling more and more angry and aggrivated with my life and the people in it..

im gonna get back on schedule with my pill and pray that it helps...