Hey guys

Aubrey (aml0017) Community Member February 22, 2012
  • Hey guys, I haven't posted for a while.  I haven't been feeling great but not horrible either.  I have been coming by to read shareposts and comment once in a while but haven't had much to share really.  Just kind of "flat" lately like another poster said.

     

    Had a bit of a tumultous night last night.  Was winding down from a relaxing Mardi Gras holiday when my sister sent me the dreaded "We need to talk" text.  I hate that because my imagination went into overdrive.  Anyways, turns out she is pregnant, a bit of a relief actually compared to what I was imagining.  However, her situation is not ideal.  She has had problems with anxiety/depression and quit school last year, was trying to go back.  Only just got a part time job.  She is turning 24 this weekend and is friends with the father but they are not in a relationship now and he is not financially stable either.  I had to go with her to tell our mother, a bit nerve wracking but turned out well strangely.

     

    The thing is, this is the kind of thing that would normally send my anxiety soaring.  And of course, I am worried about her due to her situation.  However, under it all, I am really actually excited for her.  For her, and me, and our brother, growing up with a narcissistic mother, we have all had our issues with self esteem and anxiety and are not overall happy, emotionally healthy people.  None of us have seemed to settle down with families or be successful.  It seemed like we never would.  And though I would not have wished it to happen in this way, I feel like this is a good thing for our family, a hope for the future.  I guess it is easy for me to say because I am not having to deal with the actual raising of the child.  Maybe I am living vicariously through her because I don't foresee this happening for me, I don't know. 

     

    Anyways, that's all I wanted to say for now.

6 Comments
  • Judy
    Health Guide
    Feb. 22, 2012

    Regardless of how it happened, I'm happy for you.  Your little niece or nephew could be a wonderful blessing in your life.  Even though I have sons of my own, I didn't really appreciate their awesomeness when they were little and it seemed like so much work, but now that I have a grandson, it's all about the awesomeness!  And it gives me a second...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    Regardless of how it happened, I'm happy for you.  Your little niece or nephew could be a wonderful blessing in your life.  Even though I have sons of my own, I didn't really appreciate their awesomeness when they were little and it seemed like so much work, but now that I have a grandson, it's all about the awesomeness!  And it gives me a second chance to be a nurturing influence in a child's life, in a better way than I was with my children.  I've always wanted to make sure they didn't suffer the effects from my own narcissistic mother; true to form, she never wanted to be bothered much with them and today can't figure out why they don't make attempts to see her.

     

    So, I hope all goes well for everyone in your family!

    • Aubrey (aml0017)
      Feb. 22, 2012

      I agree.  In fact, one of the good things about this situation is that I think that my mom will be a great grandmother at this point in her life.  Go figure.

  • Marishka
    Feb. 25, 2012

    Hi,

     

    being an aunt is such a special blessing.  You have a wonderful thing.  You can give this baby so much love and I bet it will make you feel good and more meaning in your life. 

  • LyraStorm
    Feb. 25, 2012

    I love your attitude towards this. It's a good thing not to get anxious and your enthusiasm could possibly rub off on your sister and makes things easier for her too. Congratulations on a new member of your family.

  • Merely Me
    Health Guide
    Feb. 22, 2012

    Hey!

     

    Good to see you.  Been wondering about you and others who had dropped out of sight (and site) for awhile. 

     

    This is really good news.  I can feel your excitement about this.  Babies always change the dynamic of a family and it sounds like maybe having a new family member for you all to share joy in...will do your family...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    Hey!

     

    Good to see you.  Been wondering about you and others who had dropped out of sight (and site) for awhile. 

     

    This is really good news.  I can feel your excitement about this.  Babies always change the dynamic of a family and it sounds like maybe having a new family member for you all to share joy in...will do your family good. 

     

    How are you doing otherwise?  Is the flat feeling part of depression or something else?

     

    Please keep writing...you were missed!

     

    MM

    • Aubrey (aml0017)
      Feb. 28, 2012

      I think the "flatness" is depression, just not the outright laying in bed all day crying kind.  I think it is more that I have dealt with depression/anxiety so long I can somehow repress it in my day to day life.  It seems I am ok but it is still there under the surface and can come up anytime, like today in fact.  It kind of worries me more...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      I think the "flatness" is depression, just not the outright laying in bed all day crying kind.  I think it is more that I have dealt with depression/anxiety so long I can somehow repress it in my day to day life.  It seems I am ok but it is still there under the surface and can come up anytime, like today in fact.  It kind of worries me more than the outright depression though.  At least I know that will go away eventually.  The "flatness" seems more pervasive and long lasting, more sinsister if that is the right word.