There is a lot of discussion on this site about depression itself and medical and alternative coping methods. However, I have not seen anything about the bad ways to cope. For example, excessive eating or spending, even drug use. Of course these things are bad but they are a "band aid" for depression.
When I am in a really bad depression, I don't eat, sleep, go out of the house or do much of anything. However, when I am in a relatively functional place, I tend to overeat and overspend to cope with the bad feelings. Of course, it doesn't really help but it does make you feel better momentarily. I have been coping with my depression (and dysthymia) a lot better lately without having to resort to those methods. I lost 30 lbs. and have really curbed my spending.
However, sometimes it is too little too late. Even though I am getting better slowly, I am currently on medication for high blood pressure due to my horrible diet. I am still working on that and it is getting better every day. Stress just compounds the problem though. Also, my years of overspending are finally coming back to haunt me now. I am now mired in credit card debt that will take me years to pay off. This is in fact what most recently sent me into a downward spiral. I am dealing with it now but it is just another burden on my back.
My point is, I am dealing with all of this due to years of NOT dealing with the underlying cause: depression and anxiety. Let this be a warning to anyone who is not currently seeking the help they should. Not properly dealing with your depression can give rise to a lot of other problems. As if depression isn't hard enough!
What kind of negative "coping mechanisms" do you use or have used? Have you been able to overcome this?
It's good that you are getting things under control and it sounds like you have a pretty good understanding of how you cope with depression in unhealthy ways. I guess I'd have to say that my biggest coping mechanism usually has been anger at myself where I feel like I want to do something harmful to myself and kind of go on an internal tangent about how much I hate myself, I shouldn't exist, etc. Then I go through a period of feeling numb to deal with the anger. I've at times also used shopping and food, too, but when I'm in the angry stage, I don't want to shop because I don't deserve it or I'm so ugly there is nothing that could make me feel better. Once in a while I might drink too much because it takes away the anger. Mostly, though, I just try to cope with it by taking my medications and continuing therapy - although I have to say, sometimes the latter can trigger a short-term depressive episode, depending on what's transpired.
So, I'm sure you're not alone in how you cope and I guess it's because of poor coping mechanisms that we end up in therapy or on medication, right? If our own coping skills worked successfully, we'd be fine. I'd like to get to the point where my automatic reaction isn't anger; probably, anger might temporarily feel better than depression, I don't always know. I'm kind of curious about why you want to know more about the bad ways of coping - is it to see if you're like most people or not, or to see if you could do worse? Just wondering.
Judy,
I know I am like a lot of people. Whenever you hear about any kind of negative excessive behaviors, there is usually an underlying emotional cause (I got that from Oprah, lol!). I just wanted to open the discussion because I read a lot on this site about the depression itself, and what we SHOULD do to cope with it. However, depression affects all parts of our lives internally and externally. Sometimes coping with the depression makes all the other problems go away. However, sometimes it does not.
So, I just wanted to open the discussion. Thanks for responding!