Shame on me! Why???

I hear you. I think we all have times when we're so depressed that we can't be bothered looking after ourselves even though logically we know that will only make us feel worse! It's like the logic/rational part of our minds is being drowned by the emotional. We stop thinking and just do what we feel like doing - which is most probably nothing (or sometimes something destructive).

I'm glad you seem to have decided to return to those good things though. It's hard to get past that blockade that wants to make us misbehave but it's worth the effort in the long run. Don't be too hard on yourself, though - we are only human after all

I hope your dog is okay.

Depression is a lot of work! You have to constantly manage it just like any other illness.  And when you need to do those things to help yourself the most...the depression makes you not want to do anything.  I have been in that boat many times.  Try to do at least one or two things which can help.  But sometimes just resting can soothe as well. 

I hope things turn around and you go on an upswing after this.  Just remember that when you are down the only direction to go from there is up.  It will get better.

Thanks so much for sharing.

I agree completely; Depression IS a lot of work. At times simply taking a pill can seem like a Herculean task; I believe we've all 'been there'.

One thing to remember though; "shame" & "guilt" are probably one of the most destructive emotions we can subject ourselves to. The worst part is that they're both learned emotions! Add to that they serve no real purpose other than at times, to cripple us and rob us of our very essence. I've seen entire lives affected by these learned emotions & it's really a tragedy.

So, where am I headed with all this? Simply put, nobody will EVER 'beat us up' any worse than we do to ourselves. We all 'fall off the wagon'; how & when (& if) we get back on is what really counts.

You've certainly had your ups & downs, so please start being good to yourself. Next time you feel this way, take a walk with your dog (hope s/he's doing better!), exercise, even take a nap if it feels too difficult to even get up.  It will get you over this hump...I promise!