Checking in

By wrecked Tuesday, June 15, 2010

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I just wanted to come back with an update since there have been an overwhelming number of people with depressed significant others who have been shut out as I have. Many have wondered if there are happy endings in this situation and I truly believed there was.

But not in my case. I had to close that chapter about two months ago. It went from my support being appreciated, to getting fallen by the wayside, to me just being treated horribly and making excuses.

I have noticed this pattern is common, which is why I am following up.

I am actually grateful for this experience and can see how he was brought into my life for a good reason. I did fall into a depression, it triggered a big episode.

But all of this brought out my spiritual side. I see the world differently now. I appreciate the little things, the beauty of things.

I am grateful for my time here and the support of one another. I have not experienced anything like it before.

I am choosing to close that door of depression and not let it back in. I am choosing to sing and dance and feel free again. If there is a dark cloud, I will read, go outside or just meditate.

I know the guy I was hanging onto was worth my time, and am glad I got through if even for a minute, to make him feel loved. He is truly battling this out. Which is why I can look back now with understanding, and see how he starts new chapters to feel better.

You want to forge through and the last thing you need is worrying about another persons feelings, how you have hurt them, or even hearing them say 'I am here for you'....kind of like a disabled person being talked down to constantly reminded of their illness.

Whatever happens is for the best, and hanging on will cause a lot of pain. I thought it was a road I was meant to go down, but obviously there's bigger things in store for me now.

For quick daily inspirational pick me up messages, I would suggest reading doreen virtue's 'daily guidance from your angels'....I pick a page randomly every morning and am inspired to just live my day.

You never know what can happen in life!

Comments (8) | Add comment

Judy

6/16/10 3:00pm

Hi, Wrecked - we have missed you! I'm sorry that things didn't work out for you, but it sounds like you have taken this pain and learned a lot from it. Some people would let an experience like this define who they are, as in deciding they're worthless or unable to be loved. And you cared enough about yourself to let it go. I'm sure others reading your story who are in the same boat will find you inspiring!

LyraStorm

6/17/10 8:38am

Hi Wrecked,

You seem to be doing really well. I love all the little lessons you've learnt from the experience and am overjoyed to hear that you are feeling so good now - you sound so at peace with your life and your place in it

Thank you for checking in and letting us know how you are doing.

wrecked

6/17/10 9:39am

I definitely grew from this experience and can see the purpose in this lesson in life. He's an amazing guy who really did try to work with me, but this is the way it goes and that's the reality of it. People come into each others lives for a reason, and this experience had so much meaning. I am in a very 'zen' place and plan on keeping it that way. The main thing you need to do is look out for yourself while going through this. And if anyone needs to talk or advice, I am always here and willing to help. I feel it is what I was meant to do and quite enjoy it!

Merely Me, Health Guide

6/18/10 7:31pm

Hi Wrecked

You have a great attitude and I am glad you are here. I believe too...that people enter our lives for a reason...however time limited.

Good to see you and I hope you stick around to write more.

sue

6/26/10 11:16pm

Try yoga. It helps with depression. It is all for the best. You are so kind and you will find your true love..

wrecked

6/26/10 11:43pm

Yes, and meditation. I wanted to apologize to you for snapping, I was in a deep depression myself at the time. Since I have let this go and reconnected with myself, I have not had those feelings since. I am truly at peace with life, and have actually reconnected with an old high school love of mine, so everything works out how it is meant to. Hopefully more people will be able to see some kind of meaning and not become destroyed by all this. But so far, no happy endings, no looking back for the depressed person, they must keep moving forward and recreating a new world for themselves.

sue

7/ 5/10 5:33pm

I completely understand and happy for you that this chapter is finally closed. I also agree with you on the following 100%.

"no looking back for the depressed person, they must keep moving forward and recreating a new world for themselves."

However that wont fix their problems. We've done whatever we could. No regrets. I personally will never date a depressed person ever again. It's so draining. I almost got back together with my ex at one point but it blew up again. I am done. It's just all for the best. Attend more party, chill out with friends. If you dont have enough single friends you can also go on line. Just keep yourself busy. Nice girls like you are so rare nowadays. Some guy would be so lucky to have you. I am waiting for you to share your new love stories. It is going to take a while to get back to the normal dating world. But be strong and patient. All the best!!!

wrecked

7/ 5/10 7:28pm

It is very true, if you go back to your depressed guy, it will happen again and just go in vicious circles. It's best to jump off as fast as possible. I do know what depression feels like, but I also know what peace and happiness feels like. I'm choosing to be happy. But we did what we could for these guys and that says alot about our character. Now it's time to look out for ourselves. A new romance is budding with someone I haven't seen in 17 years. Came into my life like a storm, just how I like it...haha. The dating scene doesn't seem special enough for me. I trust that whoever was meant to be in my life will be there....this one certainly found his way back to me all these years later. And no depressed guys. It's sad they have no concept of love and accepting love, and it is way beyond our control. Best of luck to you, if you are still seeing a new someone, if not, I am sure it won't take long. Like you said, girls like us are rare!

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