Sunday, February 06, 2011
|| 7:20pm ||

Here are two prime examples of how stupid I am.

Watching Who do you think you are..I think that's title of the NBC show following celebrities and their ancestors. So Vanessa Williams was thinking out loud with the years 1861-1865 and saying, "so that would be the civil war." My mom chimed in with, "well, duh." I didn't know that. I didn't even begin to admit that I didn't know it. I've already admitted something today to her showing how stupid I really am.

So I was reading the book called Shyness & Social Anxiety Workbook. It was talking about basic anxiety stuff. It mentioned the phrase "fight or flight" response. It broke the meaning down. A light bulb went off inside my head because 1) I finally understand what that phrase means and 2) I'm 26 years old and also suffering from anxiety and had no idea what that meant. God I'm stupid.

Those are just a few examples of how stupid I am.

So my mom and I went shopping today.

It was bonus time at Clinique and was very busy. I was proud of myself for going through with it because the basic consult. was right in front of the crowds of people waiting to be assisted at the counter. So I was telling everyone I had Skin Type IV very Oily skin, had enlarged pores, and blackheads. Also the employee was telling me and everyone around me. No I wasn't talking to them, and neither was the employee but that's what it/I felt like. Then to make matters worse there was a skinny, attractive young girl maybe my age or less standing to the side of me and staring at me. When I'm around people who are much more prettier and skinnier than I am I feel so ashamed and like I have three heads. I feel like a cow compared to them. Like I wasn't worth their time in helping me or they should have been helping the prettier people. I got through it, but it was somewhat anxiety-provoking.

I bought the toner of the 3-step skin care system. I knew they were going to try to sell the skincare system if I brought up the enlarged pores and blackheads. I told them I tried it before but thought I had an allergic reaction because of my contact allergies and fragrance allergy. She said it's all derm. tested (which I knew) and fragrance free (which I think I knew). But I only bought the toner. You're able to return stuff if it doesn't work out so I may do that if it does break out my face. She did say that people can breakout when they're using it, but I'm not sure if she meant blemishes or rashes because last time I used it it was rashes NOT blemishes.

I went into Icing because I was wearing a headband that I don't ever wear. it doesn't have any teeth and it looked fairly decent so I got the idea to look for other headbands without teeth. I normally wear headbands with teeth, but without teeth the look is different. I also bought two pairs of earrings there.

Bought my two things at Target and tried on shoes, but none fit.

Went to B&N and they don't carry my Pain Pathways magazine. I'm thinking I either got it at Books & Co. or Borders. I asked about Paste and the employee said they had four in stock and none had been sold, but she looked though all the magazines and couldn't find it. I ended up buying two card making and paper crafting magazines. I also bought a magazine called Bust because Portia de Rossi was on the cover and there's an article about her in it. Coincidentally, it's also the sex issue. lol But I flipped through the pages when I got home and I love the ads and other content. I found an ad for a website called iloveembroidery.com. I checked it out and it looks neat. Lots of neat patters. My sister started some embroidery and now I'm going to do some looking online and youtube and maybe the library to see how to do it and what it's all about. I may already have a kit buried away in my craft box I have in my closet. If not, I'll buy one next time at the mall.