Hey Corrine   I can hear the pain and despair in your message here.   If you are able I want you to get up and refocus if you can.  Take a walk or change your scenery if just for a few minutes.  You need to get out of your head.  I don't know exactly what you are going through but I have been at the bottom of my emotional well and it is such a difficult place.  You need to break this despair for the moment so that you can think straight.   If the pain is too much I want you to call one of the hotline numbers I gave to you.   Here they are again:   1-800-273-TALK (8255)      1800-784-2433     1800-799-4889   If it helps...keep writing here...let it out.  Please keep reaching out.  You don't need to suffer like this alone.   Okay?   I am really sorry you are going through this bad time.  Please hang in there and let us know if there is any more we can do.