My son is in prison for the eigth time and filing for divorce from the mother of my only two young n

12/14/08

Trisha Marie

Topics:Caregiving

grandsons. She uses them as currency to get what she wants from me...mostly money. My husband is 13 years older, a stroke victim, diabetic and of a generation that feels a woman must do it all inside the house. I help him outside to feed the livestock or whatever as well. He's retired and spends most of his time dozing in front of the TV. I work as a in-home health care giver. It seems someone is always wanting something from me but I get next to nothing back. I feel empty and think about dying but know the grandsons will have no one who is constant in loving them if I go. The boys love me and tell me so often when we are together, but are too young to phone me on their own, so i only get calls when their Mom lets them. She often won't answer my calls, especially when she owes me money. Her requests for help are always couched as necessary to keep the boys housed or clothed, etc. I can't say no to that.

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Answers (2)

Sunday, December 14, 2008

psychoward1

Your situation sounds very rough. My advice would be to find a good counselor for yourself and start rebuilding your life the way you want it to be. Find a counselor that will listen to you. Sometimes all it takes is to have someone that will listen. If you think you are suicidal and cant go on then you should call your doctor.

Good luck,

Pat

Thank you for your input
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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Merely Me

My goodness Trisha...you are going through so much. And you work as a caregiver too. It sounds like you need someone to care about you. It is awfully hard to get up each day and give when you need someone to give to you.

I am really sorry you are going through this hard time.

What do you think it would take to refill your reserves? What brings you joy?

I do want to remind you that you do matter. There is never anything resolved by ending things. You would just leave a legacy of pain behind. If it ever reaches that point where you can't take it anymore...I want you to call one of the suicide hotlines okay?

I wish I had a magic wand to make things better for you. It does sound like you could use some emotional support. There is an on-line support group right here on Health Central and I will give you the link here.

Please hang in there. I know...easier said than done. Some days it is a huge achievement just to survive the day. I do hope things get better for you.

And thank you for your question.