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Sunday, October 25, 2009 ElkaRose asks

Q: Where to begin! I think I must have started with my depression back in the spring. And now in the fa

Where to begin! I think I must have started with my depression back in the spring. And now in the fall, it has been the worst I can remember. I also had it a few years ago, but this is really bad this time. I am not making smart decisions. I'm treating ever day as if it's my last, so who cares. I had a small affair that just busted up and annoyingly that bothers me (I know how bad that sounds). I also know how bad it sounds for me to say there is nothing wrong with my husband, because there isn't. I am just unhappy. My only job is raising our 2 kids. Sure this is a proud job, but it's no unique and most parents do it. Besides that and the housework I ignore, I do nothing. I have no attention span for movies, reading, magazine, making and sipping tea or cooking/baking. I have been able to shut down almost every think productive that I'm capapable of doing. I don't think it matters. Would a drug that's not as SSI be something that could lighten some of this up?

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Answers (1)
10/25/09 11:34pm

Hello, ElkaRose.  I think you should probably talk to a doctor about medication, or you could start with a psychologist who could evaluate you for depression and tell you whether or not medication could help.  Maybe you need to make some changes in your life; it sounds like you can't find a purpose for living.  A therapist could help you explore that and support you while you make any changes you decide are necessary.  Do you know what has triggered it each time?  Untreated depression is more likely to return, so I hope you will seek out some help.

 

I'm glad you reached out here and hope you will write again and let us know how you're doing.  Life really can be better than this and you have a right to feel happy.

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10/26/09 7:16am

The trigger usually has something to do with one of my children. One is Autistic and one is developmentally delayed. So some days can be a bit much. I don't mind taking medication, but I am not sure I feel like dealing with the side effects. That can be taxing too. 

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10/26/09 9:28am

I can totally understand where you're coming from and what a challenge you deal with.  Both of my sons have had depression since they were 12 years old and the younger one is both autistic and developmentally disabled.  I have been on medication for more than 20 years and it's been life-saving, as well as therapy.  I take Wellbutrin, which has no side effects for me, but I did try a number of others first, some of which worked for a while and some did have intolerable side effects.  You can talk to your doctor about your concerns with that.  Both of my sons are still on medication, as well, for depression.

 

On an optimistic note, I'll also tell you that the son who is autistic and developmentally disabled now has a job with Social Security, full time, and has his own apartment with some assistance from an agency - he is 31.  My older son attempted suicide twice but today he is 35 and a wonderful father and husband.  I used to feel despair at times about them, but with a lot of help, we got them through to adulthood!

 

If it would help you to talk about your children here, please do.  I would like to hear more about them.  We also have a site for learning disabilities, including autism, that you might want to check out, called Friends of Quinn that you might find helpful. The people on that site include friends and family of those with disabilities.

 

Please know that there is help out there if you reach out.

 

 

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10/26/09 10:18pm

Goodness...thank you so much. You have no idea how much your response has helped me. 

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