I have been depressed since I was sixteen and attempted suicide many times then. I then developed aneroxia really bad and almost died and I think it was another attempt to wither away to nothing. I am on meds, have been since the aneorxia. I can't exercise too much because I am one of those obsessive exercisers. I am almost thirty and don't see a future. I am in the constant depression, some times better than others, but I don't feel real. I don't feel hopeful, engaed in life. I don't want to be touched, date, leave my house for how I think I look and feel. Do I have that dsythemia thing or just depression because depression comes and goes. Mine seems to always be there and then get really REALLY bad at times. I overmedicate just to keep from taking that leap. I have tried counseling, been hospitalized, but nothing. Do I have a chance? I am afraid I will hurt myself one day or worse die alone with no one in my life. Any suggestions or advice, please be gentle.