Me and my girlfriend have both been going through some rough times lately, although I'm dealing with mine and still keeping close to her, shes starting to become distant and it seems like she just wants to run from her problems. She tells me that she loves me, and some days she wants to be with me, and others she doesn't. She always gets these feelings of wanting to be alone, and it hurts her cause she knows being alone will hurt me. She doesn't know how to fix it, its almost like an addiction. Its obviously not healthy, she knows that, but she wants to be alone, so she gives in. She expressed that she doesn't want me to leave, but shes afraid of keeping me here for selfish reasons if she can't decide what she wants. I told her I'm here for her because I love her and this is what I want, but I'm starting to think that if this happens now, it might happen again and again. Truthfully, shes alone, she always talks about how she needs no one and she can do everything by herself. I tell her she can't do this alone and thats why I'm here. But I'm starting to think that I'm being used because she has no other friends (she pretty much dropped out of her social circle before I met her). I wonder if she did have her friends whether she would have just left and broken contact easily.
She has a history of failed relationships because of this, and I'm wondering if this is even possible. She tells me that she always destroys her relationships because she can't hold her end of the deal. She says that she doesn't mind physically being with someone, but sometimes she just doesn't want any emotional connection to people. I'm convinced that this is the result of her first serious relationship (High school boyfriend of 4 years cheated on her cause she didn't want to have sex, had sex with her best friend, and dumped her), or her upbringing (Mom had her when she was 18, raised her alone, often times my girlfriend tells me she grew up entertaining herself cause no one else was there). I think theres something seriously wrong, I don't know if its depression or something else, I told her I'm not professional help but she needs to go seek professional help. Of course she can't afford it, I offered to help her pay, she says no and gives me the classic "I've done it before and it didn't help me." (Its the truth, but I have no clue whether or not it helped her.)
I love her to pieces but I'm not in any shape myself to get strung along with no apparent continuation of the relationship in sight. I know she carries alot of baggage, but it just does not mean anything when you love someone as much as I love her. I carry my own set of serious problems and she puts up with that. Do I stay here and wait it out, or should I just accept that she has problems she can't or won't fix and leave.