I have had a lifelong problem with uncontrollable crying. This can come in response to criticism, compliments, you name it. It's embarrassing, but I can't control it. Can anyone assist me with this? How can I stop the tears once and for all? I have tried breathing exercises, affirmations, and trying to just shrug it off, but nothing has helped.
Hi, Lauren. In addition to Merely Me's suggestions, I want to add that if you live in the US, your county probably has a mental health clinic that charges according to your ability to pay, if you want to find a therapist. Your friends and your husband cannot be objective but a mental health professional can support you in getting to the bottom of your waterworks if it turns out to be emotionally based. Perhaps something happened to you as a child - which you might not even remember - that has caused unresolved grief which gets triggered by certain things. I'm sure it's difficult to feel like you have no control over your emotions, which can happen when we get overwhelmed or can't understand what's going on. This is a good place to come to for support, you can talk about anything that is on your mind and chances are very good that someone here has experienced the same thing, or something similar.
Hang in there and hope you feel welcome to write again.
It may be that you are what is known as a highly sensitive person. Things may upset you more than they do the average person. The good thing about being highly sensitive that you may also be more empathic and compassionate. The challenge of it is that your emotions can overwhelm you, as you have described.
It could also be that you have an underlying medical condition that makes it more difficult for you to control your emotional responses, such as a neurological or hormonal condition. Having a complete work-up by your healthcare provider might be a good idea. You might also consider your cycle and if the crying is worse during certain times of the month.
You might also try keeping a log of the types of events that trigger the crying. Is there a pattern to them? What happens after? How long do you cry? How frequent is the crying? Every day? Once a week? It could be that certain events are triggering memories of physical or psychological trauma, or of some kind of loss you're grieving.
Of course therapy is another option to help with your issue. The doctor might even be able to prescribe some type of medication to help with this problem.
Here are some articles you might find useful:
Diagnosing Generalized Anxiety Disorder
10 Things You Need to Know About Anxiety Medication
7 Ways to Beat the Blues
Thank you for taking time out to respond to my post, I have expereinced a great deal of trauma/grief growing up. From muliple rapes from various people, being alone all of the time, having to grow up rapidly and so on. Depending on the thought sI could cry for hours using and entire roll of toilet paper in one setting. Crazy thing is that I don't get emotional when I watch movies or if a person comes to cry on my shoulder. Its only when things effect me, I suppose, yet at times I cry for no given cause. No, no other symptoms that I know of. Nothing much happens afterward, I try my hardest to calm down, I believe hormones are normal. Somebody can say they are disappointed in an action I have made and the water works begin, um, even if my husband is giving constructive criticsm the tear flow. When I am angry it gets worse. That is all I can think of at the present time.
You have been raped multiple times? I am so sorry. Your crying does not seem out of the norm for someone who has experienced repeated trauma. Is it possible that you have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder? This is when something in your environment may trigger an old memory and the feelings associated with that memory or trauma. The triggers could be anything...someone's tone of voice...a smell...something you see which reminds you...and this process can be something you are not even consciously aware of.
I really do think that therapy may help you. You have a lot of emotions right under the surface ready to come out. It is interesting that you say anger triggers it. I am sure if you have experienced such sexual traumas that you have a lot of anger and sorrow.
Please think about seeing a mental health professional to help you work through this. You don't need to deal with this on your own.
Let us know how you are doing. Thank you for reaching out here.
Yes, Raped, molested, pretty mch hurt, mentally, physically and emotionally. I've overcome a lot of obstacles, but apparently there is still something that is causing this issue. I really felt I gew form a lot and have forgiven for my own sake. But depending on the situation those water works begin. I will be in touch, thank you for your help
Since it has been so long since Lauren's orignial post, this is for others with the same problem.
I too had almost daily episodes of uncontrolled tearfulness if not crying. I am an adult with attention deficit hyperactive disorder and I am very sensitive, or, as some put it, I wear my heart on my sleeve. Then I got depressed and my doctor put me on Pristiq which is an antidepressant also good for A.D.D.. It worked fine. However, I decided after a couple of years, it was time to come off. (Warning: Prestiq is very hard to get off and they did nothing to help people with this problem). Now that I am off, I am not feeling depressed, but the tearfulness came back! It is sooooooo embarassing!
So, my suggestion is to try Prestiq.
My heart broke when I read your question and then to read more about your past. I am so sorry about what you have been through. Have you thought about seeing if there is a free service in your community, like a volunteer's in medicine? They may be able to help you find a therapist or some other suggestion as to where you could find help for free/low cost. I also wonder from the physical side of things if you could have a thyroid issue. I am not a physician, but I believe it can cause anxiety which could be a factor in your crying. I hope you can get some help somewhere. Feel free to ask anything or talk, I will try and help!
Thank you for your concern and response, I guess I will look into it when I get the chance. We are experiencing some crazy things in our life right now, Had to make an emergency move from IL, to Oklahoma to save my Husbands children and get them out of the clutches of the State. They were taken away from their mother due to her negligence and allowing her boyfriend (registered sex offender) to rape and molest her 9 yr old daughter (8 at the time). So we dropped everything to get here and are starting over, again, for as long as this process takes. Once we get the chance, I will try and seel counseling, I know that God got me it just crazy how all of hese old things come up within my mind that I forgotten about. I also find it nuts on how emotionally I become during certain times. I thought I was over crying but it returns. So you all may be onto something, I thought I'd never be the one having to seek professional help. Thyroid??? Yes it did happen a lot, like I was a symbol of sex or something, It first happened by my cousin (female) then my brother's cousin (male) just went down hill form there. I am greatful because it made me a better person today and the things I have been through can help many others during there horrible time and teach them how to avoid many things as well. I will stay intouch and thank you again.