I wish I had an answer for you...I am going through the same thing with my spouse. This is one of the most difficult things I have ever experienced. As the previous response said - my husband is on for work and sports. But, the minute he enters the house he withdraws into his shell. I have tried to do everything to get him to go get serious help but to no avail. This is truly affecting our sons.
My biggest problem with my husband is that EVERTHING is my fault. He takes responsibility for nothing. I am so tired and at this point I do not know how much more of this I can take. I love him dearly but this draining my emotional health. What do you do??