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I just came across this string of discussion and it brought me to tears. My husband of only a year became depressed out of the blue a few months back. We have been to joint and individual therapy for a few months but it is extremely hard to deal with. He has always been sensitive, vibrant, affectionate, and funny. He is now isolating himself, refuses to tell me he loves me, drinks excessively, and if I get upset looks at me with deadpan eyes. He refuses medication but does not entirely follow through with the self help route which leads to a roller coaster in our life. It is making me depressed as I worry all the time, am hurt, and have extreme anxiety about his feelsing about me and his mood. Just reading these few posts has made me feel not so alone and I feel badly for you all as I understand completely what you are going through.