Q: Is my boyfriend depressed. He always talks about being depressed and tells me he's going to kill himself. Iv only been going out with him for 2 weeks and known him for just under a month.
Hi, Joan -
I would take any talk about suicide quite seriously and urge him to go to someone with professional experience to get advice about what he's going through. A school counselor could probably refer him to someone. If he's bringing up suicide a lot, he could call a suicide hotline to talk to a trained person. Here are a couple:
- 1-800-273-TALK
- 1-800-SUICIDE
Remember that you can't take responsibility for making decisions like this for him - you can suggest he get help, but it's up to him to do something. You've been seeing each for just a short time, yet he's talking about dying for you. Do you feel that he knows very much about you as a real person to be so deeply attached? Do you feel OK when he talks about his devotion, or does it make you feel uncomfortable? Do you feel this strongly about him after a couple of weeks of dating?
I'd think carefully about what the relationship means to you and whether or not, given your experience with depression in your family, this is the right guy for you.
John
Joan, it does sound like he's depressed. Is he getting any help for it? If not, maybe you can convince him to see a doctor about it. It sounds like you've had plenty of experience in dealing with this in your family. If he won't get help, I would think twice about continuing this relationship, since you don't have that much time invested in it. Maybe you could talk to the school counselor about it, too.
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