OK. My story is not too dissimilar to most on the forum and has helped a great deal. My boyfriend and I had a fantastic friendship up until a year ago when we both finally admitted we had attraction for each other. It was fantastic. Come Halloween, he proposed to me. It felt so right and we made small plans. However, as weeks went by I opened up about certain aspects of my life that even I am not proud of, but I felt he ought to know. I've always believed that if you are with someone that important to your life, you disclose everything. I have to tell you now, we both work together and have children from previous relationships. The crucial point came around Xmas time when his young child started having fits. It was a really worrying time for him. He was already down because of other problems going on in his life. Feeling strong I felt I could withstand everything and be strong for both of us. However, come January, we hadnt exactly had a fabulous romantic ideal Xmas, and it was the night before his sons scan. He decided to text me and tell me he was spending the night around his and his ex's house so he could be there for the morning. The long and short of that was I lost myself and started accusing him of being there for his ex etc. Understandably it didn't go down too well and resulted in a few hurtful exchanges. I drove and met him late at night and we talked and he said he had these serious issues about my past. They, I have to say, to me are not that serious. Anyway, long and short of it, we went through quite a rough and depressing time. I spoke to some "friends" from work to gain advice. Things have been up and down since then. We have had really happy times but he seems to go through days where he will barely talk to me saying he doesn't know why he feels down. I am always of the belief that behaviour breeds behaviour. In turn, I have got depressed. I went and saw my GP a few months ago and they referred me for counselling and also prescribed meds. I didn't want to resort to pills but saw the counsellors a few times but it didn't feel like it was helping. Anyway, we had a row last month and I was quite verbal too him. That night we had been drinking too ( nothing too unusual for us ) and I ended up jumping out of the bedroom window. I seriously fractured my pelvis and have been bedridden for 7 weeks and have had 2 major operations. All my fault. My boyfriend or ex now, started to distance himself virtually straight away. What then became apparent was that people at work had been going back to him and telling him things that I had said. Some of which had not come from me at all. He has got himself into the very dark hole of depression now. Even he admits that. Only thing is he wouldn't accept help. Even my crisis team offered support. But he didn't want it. Now he has said he has an appointment to see a counsellor tomorrow. A couple of days ago he text saying sorry and he has been doing some thinking. I insisted that he came over to talk. He took me out in the car and said he was splitting up with me. He said neither of us were making each other happy and couldn't get better whilst we are together. I flipped. I still am not well mentally, and now this. I tried to get out of the car to hurt myself again. I felt totally unloved and betrayed by this man who I totally adore and would die for. I begged him for a second chance but he wouldn't say anything. I text after he took me home. He called to see if I was ok. Clearly I wasn't. I begged again through text all the next day for him to give me a chance. He phoned me in the evening and I was very emotional. I asked if we could go away together to get space on our own. He point blank refused. He apologised and said he shouldnt have phoned and hung up He was meant to be taking me to see my consultant next week so I can see if I can start to walk yet. But he hasn't answered my email. I then heard yesterday that he has already told people at work that we have split. I was distraught. So I text him saying that I was hurt etc. He has now deleted me off his games contacts and i don't know what to do. Does this mean the end? Or is he giving us time to get better? When I said could we see each other when we are better he said no. I am lost. Opinions on the net say to give him time to miss me. Also so I can grieve. What are others opinions?? Grateful for any advice.