Diabulimia -- My Story

Then on April 17, 2006 I found myself in DKA yet again. I didn't know it then, but that day would be a day that would change my life forever.

It was the final straw for my doctors and my parents. Everyone knew that if they didn't do something drastic I wouldn't live to see 20. At 16 I was already beginning to show signs of diabetic complications in my kidneys and my legs, and by that point my self-esteem was close to none. Every doctor was in agreement that if I went home and back to school the DKAs would keep occurring and the next DKA could be my last.

I stayed in the hospital for 54 days as everyone searched for some place that would help me overcome this huge thing that had taken complete control over my life.

A treatment center was found for me but it was in Virginia. It really looked like the only place that would be able to help me though, because it specialized in treating diabetics with "diabulimia." It was the only thing left in the attempt to save me.

On June 6, 2006 I said good-bye to my friends and my family and made my way to "Cumberland." I was very scared and angry at first. I felt like my mother had abandoned me and couldn't believe that I was being sent away.

Living there was strange. I had never really met so many other diabetics that were dealing with the same situation that I was dealing with, and it just made me feel like I wasn't alone in my struggle anymore.

The hardest part was when I had left Hawaii for Virginia, I promised my two best friends that I would be back. But after some soul searching and some help from my mother, I realized that unless I could really "start fresh" I would never be able to truly escape this haunting downward spiral I kept putting myself on.

So I decided to stay in Virginia with my dad. On August 31, 2006 I left Cumberland's doors for good.

Cumberland offered many different therapeutic programs, including individual, family, and group therapy. While individual and family therapy was helpful, I think that the most helpful for me was group therapy because before I had always felt so alone in the feelings I had towards what was happening to me and it was the first time in my life that peers felt a similar way.

So now I put the 8th grade picture of me away and look at my most recent picture; this is the face I know as mine. I'm smiling and I'm truly happy in this picture -- and I'm healthy.

There are some days that are harder than others, but as I'm sitting here now I've just completed my second Thanksgiving in a row that HASN'T been in a hospital. In April it will be 2 years since my last DKA, and I'm looking forward to a future that two years ago I never would've thought possible.

Editor's note: If you are struggling with an eating disorder, or believe a friend is, there are resources to get help:

From the National Eating Disorders Association, a list of eating disorder information.