When you have diabetes it can really put stress on a relationship. The person that does not have diabetes will need to be understanding, patient, kind, and sometimes your nurse in the middle of the night! Having diabetes is a mentally exhausting process for a person with diabetes as well as your partner.
I decided to interview my husband - to get inside his head and see what he thinks about living with a person with diabetes.
Here we go...
GINA: What has been the toughest part of living with someone who has diabetes?
MIKE: Seeing the strain it puts on you on a daily basis and how it sometimes, not very often, but sometimes gets the better of you. Not being able to help you at times or not being able to say the right thing to make a situation better. But the toughest part, by far, is every once in a while when you get that look on your face like you’re being held back. That truly breaks my heart because I know you like being active and going out and doing things on a whim but can’t, sometimes, because of a low or a high blood sugar.
GINA: Did my diabetes cause you any hesitation when thinking about proposing to me?
MIKE: It never once crossed my mind as something that would keep me from asking you to marry me.
Believe me, there were plenty of other things that made me question the sanity of my decision to propose to you, but not diabetes.
It doesn’t define who you are to me. Yes, it’s obviously a very significant part of who you are and who are as a couple and it influences a number of things in our lives. But it doesn’t and can’t ever change the person that you are inside and that’s who I fell in love with. And nothing, not diabetes, not anything is ever going to change that.
I knew there would be challenges and ups and downs (or highs and lows) but I also knew that not one of those things would ever be greater than the love I have for you. So, to be honest, it never even figured in my decision.
GINA: What have you learned about yourself and me in the time that we have lived together?
MIKE: I have learned that I am more supportive than I ever thought I was capable of being and at the same time not as understanding as I always thought I was. I know there are things I can do better in terms of helping you cope but it’s only been a year so come back in 12 months and ask me that question again and, hopefully, I’ll be able to tell you there isn’t anything I can think of that I need to be doing better.
I have learned that you are far stronger than I ever thought you were. I learned that you have to figure out and deal with more problems and concerns on a daily basis than most people. I learned that you have accepted this and will never once ask why me or complain about it not being fair, and that is something to marvel at because I think a lot of people, whether they admit or not ask, “Why me?”
I learn something from you everyday about being a better, stronger and more focused person.