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Sunday, November, 22, 2009
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Avoiding Diabetes

Gretchen Becker
Gretchen Becker
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Author, Humorist, wildlyfluctuating.blogspot.com

Gretchen Becker studied biology for 8 years at Radcliffe/Harvard,...

Gretchen Becker

Wednesday, August 19, 2009
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[Humor]

 

Most people don't want to get type 2 diabetes, and they'd like to know how they can prevent it. I have a few suggestions based on the risk factors for the disease.

 

1. Your risk increases when you're over 40 years old.

 

One strategy to reduce your risk is to avoid ever being over 40 years old. You might consider remaining 39 for the rest of your life, although this could significantly reduce your chances of ever getting Social Security.

 

Another option would be to ride your motorcycle without a helmet, drive real fast down the interstate during an ice storm, or mix and match unusual combinations of drugs on your 40th birthday.

 

2. Your risk increases if you have diabetes in your family.

 

The solution here is to avoid being born into a family with diabetes. If you're already born, this is a little tricky, but you could quit your job and spend all your time trying to prove that you were adopted.

 

3. Your risk increases if you belong to certain racial groups.

 

Here the solution is easier. Just check the "Other" box on the US Census forms, and maybe your diabetes risk will go down.

 

4. Your risk increases if you've had gestational diabetes or given birth to a baby that weighed more than 9 pounds.

 

Don't have children and you won't need to worry about this risk factor.

 

5. Your risk increases if you never get any exercise.

 

Try to move your thumbs briskly when you sending Twitter messages. Isn't that exercise?

 

 

 

 

 

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