Managing Diabetes: Parenthood And Your Blood Sugar
My blood sugar control has been sporadic lately. I've had more highs, lows, and overall days of bouncing blood sugars than I've had in several months. I think the most frustrating aspect of poor blood sugar control is how much more time and energy my diabetes management demands when things are crazy.
Tight control does require a great deal of effort, but once I'm into a groove of eating well, testing often, and bolusing accurately, diabetes doesn't weigh on my mind much at all. On the other hand, when my blood sugar is unexpectedly high for several days in a row, I'm completely preoccupied with getting those numbers down and feeling better. I then beat myself up for letting my blood sugar get so high in the first place. Often, I "rage bolus" and end up chasing a low blood sugar later in the day.
My plate is full enough as it is right now, without adding extra diabetes stress to the mix. At work I've got several big deadlines in the fall, so my full time job sometimes requires close to 50 hours a week. I'm still pumping milk for Sienna, which I'm determined to do until she's a year old, but it takes a lot of time and isn't terribly convenient. Also, Sienna is starting to have some separation anxiety and wants her mommy's attention in the evenings, not to mention once or twice in the middle of the night. Life is good, but busy.
This week I realized that Sienna needs more of my undivided attention in the evenings. Typically we're home just before 6:00 p.m. and trying to get our nightly chores done, dinner cooked, Sienna fed and bathed, etc. It's hectic. I've decided to try a new approach for our evening routine. Instead of starting in on cleaning breast pump parts and making lunches for the next day, I'm going to sit and play with Sienna for awhile before it's time to feed her dinner. Those chores can wait until she's asleep.
The first night I was all excited to try this new idea, my blood sugar ended up going low. It was a stubborn low that required me to sit and eat a few little snacks before I felt better. Rather than play, cuddle, and giggle with Sienna, like I planned; she ended up watching me eat cereal while we sat on the floor together. The worst part was I felt really low. That kind of low where you can't focus and feel like you need to keep eating constantly until the feeling goes away.
For the most part, I'm okay with having diabetes. I feel like it provides me with extra incentive to live a healthy life and I get a great sense of accomplishment from managing this disease well, especially with Sienna's pregnancy. However, events like that low blood sugar this week really makes me despise this disease. Having my attention stolen away from focusing on my daughter is very frustrating and saddening. All the more reason for me to remain dedicated to solid diabetes management. By giving this disease attention up front, I will have to deal with fewer diabetes related interruptions as I go about living my life and spending time with my family. The truth is, diabetes demands our consideration, and if we ignore it, it'll find a way to get our attention.