Monday, June 04, 2012

Diabetes and Self-Blame

By Amylia Grace, Health Guide Thursday, December 03, 2009
Allow me to get all Oprah and Dr. Phil on you for a moment. I had an "a-ha" moment today while watching Dr. Phil. He was speaking about blame and made it crystal clear that Blame implies intent and that in the absence of the intention to do something, there is no need to blame yourself (or another). ...
Aid for 300,000+ Haitian Diabetics Arriving
Anonymous
Betsy
12/ 3/09 12:45pm

I've been dealing with depression my whole life and I've discovered that regular exercise really, really helps.  It's definitely one of those things you have to do even when you don't feel like it.  But even with meds and regular exercise I have bad days -- but I can say it's been a long time since I've had a really bad week.  I have a child with diabetes and you can bet I blame myself everytime she is high or low and like you I'm niether perfect nor a perfectionist.  It's funny everytime my daughter gets a ecent A1C I assume it's because she had too many lows -- not that I'm doing a good job.  I am doing the bet I can with what I have.  I think I'll make that my new mantra.  Thanks!~

Beth McNamara, Health Guide
12/ 3/09 2:19pm

This side of managing Type 1 -- the constant blame and beating one self up -- has been a disturbing one to me. My son is a 13 year-old Type 1 and regularly blames himself for small mishaps that push his BG numbers high like miscounting carbs or pulling out his pump. It breaks my heart.

 

I had seen Joe Solowiejczyk speak at the CWD conference last summer, and one of his comments brought me to tears (and I paraphrase): "Most diabetics go to bed every night saying 'I will do better tomorrow.'" 

 

It was at that point in time that I made a goal with myself to praise my son managing his condition overall (exercising; noticing when stress is driving him high; keeping records). I try not to focus on the high BGs.

 

I try, and he tries, and it's what we can do.

 

Thank you for writing -- this is a wonderful, insightful post.

Amylia Grace, Health Guide
12/ 3/09 2:50pm

Yes, I heard Joe on D-Life once and was so touched by what he said that I actually ended up flying to NYC just to meet with him for coffee. It was the first time in my life I'd heard things I've so long felt in my heart and mind articulated so clearly. It brought me, too, to tears. He's wonderful.

GingerVieira, Health Guide
12/ 4/09 9:44am

hi Amyllia,

 

I'm Ginger, Type 1 diabetic and competitive powerlifter, from HealthCentral's Diabeteens.com site. My favorite thing about this post is your honesty. In several sentences you both admit to making mistakes and you forgive yourself for being human! -- Imperfect!--

 

I, too, have explained to myself (actually, in a HealthCentral blog!) that I am not perfect, and mistakes are inevitable. The guilt part of diabetes can be overwhelming because we are constantly judged by our stupid blood sugar numbers.

 

In the end, what I concluded was that all of those mistakes can benefit us if we use them as information and as stepping stones in a better direction. We can't just *POOF* and become perfect. We're a work in progress!

 

I admire your persistence!

 

Ginger

12/24/09 9:38pm

I'm Shirley Ann, Type 2 PWD.  I can't remember offhand, but I've read elsewhere that Diabetics tend to have more problems with depression. 

 

I know that after I was diagnosed, I finally (after about a year of sticking with an herbal remedy that I had used for over a decade) asked my family MD for something to take away that lingering thought of suicide.  (I confessed to him that the only thing keeping me from trying it was worry about the person who found me and the effect it would have on their life.)  I've since had my dosage adjusted once--upward--and it has helped me a LOT.  I only wish I had changed to the prescription sooner!

 

Please, if you are a Diabetic--no matter if it's Type 1 or 2--talk to your doctor about any problems with depression.  Keep them informed about EVERYTHING you are taking--OTC items, prescriptions, and supplements/herbal remedies--so that they can keep track of possible interactions and possible additional medical problems.  Depression isn't a weakness, it is often attributable to biochemical imbalances that can be alleviated with medication.

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By Amylia Grace, Health Guide— Last Modified: 10/11/11, First Published: 12/03/09