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I have tried Viagra.  It does work somewhat for me.  I took 100 mg and I was able to perform to some degree.  I have done what you suggested on many occasions.  However, I still feel the need for myself and I mostly enjoy penetration.  I guess it's pschycological, but for me is a thrill to be inside her, to posess her.  I don't know how to explain it any better.  However, she has stopped wanting me and for the last three years now we haven't had sex.  I suspect that she has found someone else who can quench her thirst for good sex and has put me to the side.  I have become invisible.  So, there's a lot more riding on this than just E.D.  Our marriage is in ruins as a result.  I don't know how long it's going to last.  I, myself feel at times that it's better to leave her so she can persue her happiness with someone who hasn't got the problems that I have.  She and I were so sexually active before and now we are just living in the same household.  She's no longer interested in spending time with me, or going anywhere with me.  No dinning, or dancing, or anything for that matter.  She's only interested in the children and that is all.  So, thank you for your advise.  I'm greatful for your reply.