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Sunday, November, 22, 2009
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How do I help my husband deal with his ED?

Crystal
11/02/09
Crystal
Topics:Erectile Dysfunction

Ok... my husband has ED due to diabetes and blood pressure medications. He turned to porn and got caught. I was devastated... We have been in counseling, he for his issues, me for unrelated ones. We have sessions together to discuss intimacy rebuilding. So I am uneasy asking for sex, since much of the time the Viagra doesn't work, or not long enough. I don't want to ask for something he cannot do, so we are not sexually active. What can I do? I recently read about penis rings and bought one on line. I think it would help, but I don't know how to approach him about this. So what do you suggest?

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Jerry Kennard
Jerry Kennard
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Jerry Kennard is a psychologist
Chartered Psychologist

Dr. Jerry Kennard is a psychologist, freelance writer & consultant....

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Hi Crystal,

 

If you actually involved in counselling to rebuild intimacy it may be that you are trying to force the pace a little. Resuming sexual relations takes time and I suspect your therapy is gradually shaping you towards a point where you both feel comfortable. I'm guessing this is why you are uneasy about asking for sex?

 

If your husband has been using porn he presumably retains a sexual appetite. For many women porn can seem like an act of betrayal. They feel bad and their partner feels anger, shame and humiliation at having been discovered. Your husband was presumably using porn as a release of some sort so it may be interesting to know what is was that aroused his interest.

 

If you can both overcome this hurdle I'm sure your intimate relations will improve. There are many different methods to help with the mechanics of ED so once you can resolve your emotions, the rest will follow.

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Erectile dysfunction (ED) is the inability of a man to achieve or maintain an erection sufficient for his or his partner's sexual needs.

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