Sex with herpes

It must be devastating that your first partner gave it to you. Now that you're in a new relationship,how are you dealing? Is he eager to fool around with you? How are you avoiding manual play or at least oral? Have you had any flare ups since the initial one? I'm so scared. I haven't gotten the diagnosis yet, but I have all the symptoms. I think I got it from a guy I was seeing but not dating, and I really like him. I told him about how we may both be infected but I don't think he's going to want me anymore even if he does have it. This is all just so unreal. I'd like to keep talking to you about this, I feel relatable since we're so close in age.

Haha actually i am waiting for the guy to come over right now and i am planning to tell him tonight. I am scared  as hell and dont know how to bring it up. there are a million ways to start the convo and i am debating all of them. As for avoiding fingering, oral and such... well we have avoided oral. And that was the reason i am bringing it up tonight cause i had to say no last time. He didnt think it was a big deal cause he knows i have only been with one other person and so i assume he just thought i wasnt ready or something. 

The flare ups:  I had the initial one which was horrible and lasted for like a week and then since then i have only had one this past thanksgiving of last year. So i am going on almost a year of nothing thank goodness. It is scary tho because the last one happend when i was really stressed out and so when i stress no i worry that i might have an outbreak. 

if u wanna email me at jenwl9@hotmail.com i will respond faster and i check it more often than this.

Have you told the guy that he might have it?

and do u know if you have HSV1 or 2... 

Also, on the whole not feeling wanted thing. 

I went around for about 4 months feeling terrible about it and thinking i would never have sex again, never be able to have kids vaginally or be able to fool around again. And the worst part was that I didnt even get it from sex i dont think. I think he had oral herpes ( even tho i never ever ever saw him have a cold sore) and before we even did anything in the beginning i made him go get tested for the general stuff ( which does not include herpes) So that was a big downer. I was also very very scared because i didnt want to tell my parents or anyone else. I only told my best friend about 2 weeks ago. 

What i would recommend for now is to go to ur doc and get the lesions checked,,( they can only get a REALLY GOOD diagnosis on the exact type while they r still there. ( their is a big diff btwn type 1 and 2) and to start valtrex which is really expensive but with insurance is not bad. They also make a generic one too. 

lemme know how it works out

I am 18, just graduated high school. This morning I went to the hospital because I felt symptoms. Sure enough the doctor performs his swab test. Which hurt so much. The results haven't come back yet but he told me I contratced the disease. I held my composure until I left the hospital. They I lost it. I have not one clue what I am going to do. Im 18! Like... FUCK! You know? I am not a girl to cry. But this tore me apart. I still live at home. How do I tell my parents? I feel like this is something I should'nt ever tell anyone. I'm an attractive young woman with high ambitions and a strong sex drive. I feel like I'm a trap. Like men, you can look but you can't touch. WTF am I going to do? I know how you girls feel. I have no one to talk to. No one who understands. I feel like such a disappointment. I feel dirty. I feel like a whore. And I'm not I was just 'unlucky' I suppose. When doc told me... I told him I wanted to die. Like you said... now I'm a fucking statistic. My god.. WHY?

I am sorry to hear that you found out such bad new today. The one thing that i can say is look for information. When i first found out i was too scared to look foranything online or help. I did not tell my parents because i was 18 and too scared they were going to think i was a whore. I started medication and the dr gave me pain killers to help. The tow mixed made me throw up every time i took them and my parents eventually found out thru insurance. ( i would advise telling them but if you are not going to then dont get valtrex. it is about 600$ without insurance. There is somthing cheaper called acyclovir 200mg that is better even without insurance.) Time will make it easier to deal with too. I did not tell anyone; none of my friends or anything. Until these past 2 months i told my best 2 friends and they understand and support me. More than i thought they would. And 2 nights ago i told my boyfriend who was ok with it. I was suprised but he was very supportive and kind. If u want to chat i think my email is above but its jenwl9@hotmail.com 

I just wanted to say that things for me are going to be alright. In some miracle the doctors were wrong about me having herpes. Kind of. The blood test and all the results came back and I have the first kind not the second kind. I guess you can get the first kind down in your genitals from oral sex or just from contact? But they gave me these pills im suppose to take for the next week or so and its suppose to clear everthing right up. Although I am still going to have to live with some pretty drastic kanker sores in my mouth at least its not what I initially thought. So to all of those girls who are still waiting for the results of their tests... just pray. That is what I did and you know I'm not big on god... but it worked. No joke.

i know how u feel, i just got herpes myself 2 weeks ago, n for the first time i wanted to die, because i have always been a clean girl, i have safe sex, n i been with the same guy for 2 years now. i feel when am at home in my apartment by myself, i get mad depressed, i havent had sex in 3 weeks, and feel like impotent, my man knows cuz i told him, but now he acts different around me, and i  feel even more worse because i am not ready to deal with this, thinking about it makes me feel worthless, he doesnt touch me the same n when we try to make love he outs a towel between me n him, n i start to cry n tell him to leave, because its not fair... i feel like am a  killer out there, n am afraid that for the rest of my life ama be rejected even more worse.....my name is melissa

Why did you get it? From having lots of different partents. The chances of getting it are slim if you are white and only had a couple of partners, when you ask yourself why again think of the choices YOU made.

Southwest Medical which is a part of Parkland gave my room mate the shot and he has never caught herpes, so we know it works if your with someone who has never encounted the disease.  Now if they do something for the ones who have to live with it I would feel great.

Who are YOU to be high and mighty about it? You don't know her, you don't know the choices she's made and you definitely aren't one to be telling her to think about the choices she has made. Herpes infects people of all races, religions, backgrounds, sexual histories, etc. I am white and have only had two partners and I got it from receiving oral sex from a man who didn't believe cold sores were herpes. Until we wipe out this ignorant mindset from people like you and him, herpes will continue to prevail as a sexually transmitted infection a LOT of people have, but everyone is embarassed to talk about.

I hope YOU get wiped out...permanently.