The New Girl

By thelittleone Wednesday, December 29, 2010

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I am 21 years old and was diagnosed with genital herpes yesterday. I got it from my boyfriend who didn't know he had it. I guess in a way it's lucky I broke out...now that we know we can protect other people in the future...

I know genital herpes is extremely common, but I still feel very alone right now. It's entirely likely that I have a good number of friends who have it and don't even know, but at present I don't have any close friends who share this problem with me and can understand what I'm going through. I wish I had someone to talk to who could understand...

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no name

12/30/10 7:07pm

I feel the same way. I was diagnosed with hsv 2 years ago. It has been a struggle to accept and come to terms with. I have only had few outbreaks and I only take the meds when I need them, which I am thankful for. But it is still very depressing for me. Like you, i have a few close friends who know about my condition, but none of them can relate, which leaves me with no one to talk to either. The first year of my diagnosis was so difficult, I cried a lot. I couldn't stop thinking about how disgusting I felt, and since i decided to end my relationship with the guy who gave it to me, it was even more depressing for obvious reasons.

This year it has been a little easier to come to terms with. I try as hard as i can to tuck any of the negative thoughts i have into the back of my mind. And i read alot about the disease. The more i know about it, the less stress I have.

However, I have not been in any kind of relationship because of this. And it is so hard to be alone. I tell everyone that I love being single and i don't need the stress of a relationship, when i feel exactly the opposite. It's not that I'm afraid of the rejection i will recieve, but I'm afraid that if this information is in the hands of the wrong person everyone will know, and be disgusted.

So lately, i've just been focusing on myself, trying to be healthy, doing things that make me happy and get my mind off of hsv when i don't have any symptoms.

I'm not the best person for advice, but I can try. I also feel alone and need someone to talk to.

marlalovestoshop

1/ 9/11 6:16am

I unfortunately can understand your feelings. My husband gave it to me because he meet a woman with a belly ring, and cheated on me. There is no symptoms at first. The guys get a rash and basically don't realize what it is, and the girls get a bruise on the butt and don't know what it is and may not even see it. People are just ignorant when it comes to herpes. Basically if you stay with the same partner and take Valtrex once a day until you build up a tolerance and get less out breaks which is good you can go into a remission up to 10 yrs as I have done. Then if you get a new partner they may have herpes but not the same strain as you have so it is kinda like catching it again. Also after yrs of having it you don't always break out on the outside on a woman but on the inside you must therefore take a mirror and kind of look inside..ok Then get on the valtrex again, Your face generally will break out as this is related because yes herpes does break down your immune system, and anything such as drugs can make you have an outbreak. My advise is take good care of yourself as to go for the remission, don't switch partners unless you have to, don't let people make you feel bad about it 1 out of 5 have it, your still you inside and it will make you stronger, and yes you can live with it. I avoid peanuts it causes outbreaks on me, so no choc m & m s, eat lots of chicken need the lysine as it retards the growth of herpes. Face your problem and get educated that is how you beat it. By the way if a man (not always) opens his mouth bull falls out just because a guy may say he does not have herpes don't believe it they lie. Some people lie because they are ashamed and don't know how to cope with it. But are you any different yes you are young and my beat is it will go back into hiding for many yrs, avoid the things that bring your immune system down and you will be cool. Now your in the secret club and just remember people do keep it a secret but baby they are just the same. A good person will care about you.

Anonymous

1/21/11 11:12pm

My sympathies. I've had the disease for three years, just a little less time than and I've been in relationship with my boyfriend, who does not have it. He's understanding and we are careful, but it's easier when you are with someone with the same problem.

It's time to start checking into treatment options. You can find suggestions all over the web from others who've tried the most popular prescribed suppressants and people who've tried over the counter, natural/herb and more unusual remedies.

Since you are new to this, I'll spare you the technical stuff. It'll take a while to get your brain wrapped aound that. But here's my own experience, drug-wise. After two plus years of using various standard treatment prescriptions with intermittent results, I decided to try a mineral-based drug called Resolve. It completely cleared up my symptoms, which were generally mild (blisters, a little pain) and appeaered every two or so months.

If you want more info, respond here. Don't want to bore you with too much info.

aloneandanonymous

2/10/11 5:17pm

I was diagnosed a week ago and Im 18. I got it from a cold sore my boyfriend had. I feel alone too. I keep breaking down into tears. It just makes me feel discusting. I know it is common, but it still hurts. All I can say is your not alone. I'm here and going through the same thing. Hopefully this gets better with time.

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