Disclosure!

By unshakeablefaith Thursday, June 18, 2009

- A
- A
- A

When I have to disclose my HSV-2 status to a man that I believe could be the man I'll spend my life with I do it with the fear of rejection. I know it must be done because he has the right to know because it will effect him as it does me, but it doesn't make it any easier. I think about what he'll say and how he'll feel about the news and if he'll want to have anything to do with me. I do believe there is a man out there who will love me inspite of this news. But the silence that I hear after I tell them is unforgettable it's like I've just knocked the wind out of them.

Comments (5) | Add comment

SO HURT

6/30/09 11:47am

Its so hard every time I have to tell someone its like geting diagnosed again for the first time. there is somebody out there for us and no it does not have to be someone who had the same condition. We will make it! Stay strong =)

unshakeablefaith

7/10/09 1:56pm

I believe that as well, so we can't ever give up hope!

Alley_Cat

7/ 9/09 10:32pm

How many people have you told and been rejected by? Have you been in a relationship or had sex since you were diagnosed? I don't want to only have to date men with herpes. I want to still be able to date non-infected men. I just want to be normal and herpes-free again, this is devastating. I need answers.

unshakeablefaith

7/10/09 1:55pm

My diagnosis was confirmed in 2003 and I've been abstinent for a number of years. In 2005 there was a man who I had gotten close to and he wanted to marry me so I had to tell him. He was upset but after the shock wore off he still wanted to marry me. That relationship didn't work out (for other reasons) but any man that I get close and I feel it could be a long term relationship I have to tell them. It's always with the fear of rejection but I can't not tell them.

SO HURT

7/12/09 3:50pm

the three men I have dated (one of which I had sex with) and have had to tell before things went that way all handled it differently but kinda the same. First it always shock and rejection. After theyve had time to think about it they usually come around and then it ends up not working for other reasons than your condition . I have been in relationships since my diagnosis and have had sex as well. I even asked the guy why he was wiling to take the risk after I told him he said " I didnt think it was that big of a deal". Im glad he respected my honesty and I will say I feel this way if you cant respect me for telling you in the first place then I didnt need you anyway. Just think how many people sleep around knowing they have something and dont bother to tell. I always feel bad right after I break the news but I eventually end up feeling great that I told. It takes mature individuals on both ends to deal with this. You dont have to be reduced to dating someone with herpes. Somebody actually had the nerve to tell me that thats all I would be able to get to date me and I believed it for a while. but I dont go to herpes specific dating sites or anything. Dont reduce yourself to believing that. None of the guys I date have herpes( or at least they are unaware if they do). you can be totally normal I AM just let them know. YOu can really find out how simple minded and judgemental people are by asking this question ( the one I always ask friends, potential dates, every body!!!!) Would you date someone who had an STD? you would be suprised of the answers I got back. but if I ask a guy that and I get a No or anything negative I automatically see their character and frame of mind, and cease communication. No need to carry on right?????

Trust me when I first got this I didnt think it would ease up but it has... Im seeing this wonderful guy and hes knows about my condition and he does not have it. Now I can say I thought it was over when I told him b/c he didnt call for a week but that was the time he needed to get his mind wrapped around the situation. It ILLLLLLL GET BETTER!!!!

Disclosure!

Ask a Question