Why does herpes have to be so taboo!!

By niceguy234 Tuesday, November 13, 2007

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I was diagnosed with HSV2 in late Feb of this year. I have not been in many relationships and havent had many sexual partners, so when i was diagnosed i just wondered why me. Iam a fireman and i listen to all the guys talk about how many hookups they have had and think that they are the ones that should have it, not me... Im trying to deal with all the mental emotions that come along with this disease. Im looking to connect with people that have herpes to help deal with the mental stressors that come along with having it. My ex-girlfriend was the one that gave it to me. before her i had not been with a woman since 04. She said that she didnt know that she had it. I beg to differ though, because if her first outbreak was anything like mine you have to know something is not right. I have been taking my vitamins and trying to live healthy and havent had any outbreaks since my first one so im thankful for that. I tried staying with her because i thought no one would want me because of this, but we just couldnt be with eachother. We were definatly not a match.lol

Now im just trying to get my life back and trying to feel like this is not the end of the world. I just dont understand why herpes is so taboo! its ok to have it on your lips or mouth but God forbid that its on your genitals...

Just a little tired of H!!!

Comments (5) | Add comment

11/16/07 7:54pm

I recently myself have been diagnosed with HSV2 just this month, I got it from my ex who cheated on me and decided to not tell me about the affair until after we had unprotected sex. I know have to live with this and it hurts me to know that I will not be able to have children for fear of passing it on to them. My mother is the only one in my family that knows and has given me support. I have to say at first and still I wonder who would want me, what good would I be to someone. But I have kept myself positive and have decided I do not want this virus to define me. I am still an amazing person with a lot of goals and dreams, although some of my dreams may never come true, ie having a family, I want to take this and turn it into a way to related and be a source of comfort and inspiration to all. Just keep your head up as best you can and continue to do all the things you love so dearly.

niceguy234

11/17/07 8:56am

Thank you so much for your support. I agree that we all have to keep doing the things we love and just live life. Some days are better than others im sure you know about that. My mother was also the first person i told. She is very supportive. I wouldnt worry about passing it on to your children, i have read that they will do a c-section instead of having the baby naturally so there will be no chance of passing it on. My worst fear is never finding someone and starting a family also. The girl that gave it to me said that she had no idea that she had it but after being with her for a longer period of time i think she knew and tried to trap me. I stayed with her thinking that i will never find anyone else. I have since ended it because the relationship was horrible. Now im working on getting my life on track and realizing that this isnt the end. Thank God for the support we can find on these type of sites. Thanks again for your words of wisdom. Big Grin

dp2007

11/29/07 1:18pm

I received H from the only person I had ever slept with (at the time). It has been 5 years since I left him and I still struggle with the issue of finding someone. I was just recently engaged to a great guy who was very supportive about the virus, unfortunately our relationship did not work out. I have told few of my friends, who to my surprise were also living with H!!! it's amazing the people who have it and don;t admit it. Now that I am single again, I am terrified of rejection. I am not dirty, not a ****. I am a great christian girl who just unfortunately has this stupid virus. I wish everyone could just deal with it openly and stop being so judgmental. Maybe if we called it something else beside 'HERPES' it would be better. it just sounds gross. Grin

newtoherpes

12/19/07 11:20am

Hi niceguy.

I just just found out I have herpes II. I got it from my husband of four years who did not know he had it. He had sores but never had a bad outbreak and never thought of herpes. I hope he is telling the truth. I just had a trip to hell and back with my first outbreak. I hope to never have another. I have been thinking alot if what if my husband and I break up or he dies (were in our 40's). I will never be able to be with someone again. Well, I am not going to be a victim to this disease. I will find someone with herpes (hopefully my husband and i live along time together - but just if). You can have a wonderful life and meet someone. I know if needed, I would too. Think positive and get on with life - things could be alot worse.

Lynn

2/25/08 4:30am

Not all people who have herpes have a detectible first outbreak. The severity of your first outbreak has little to do the severity first outbreak of the person who gave it to you. In other words, the person I could give it to may get multiple lesions although I do not, and vise versa. Also herpes can be aquired when the infected person has had no visible symptoms. It can be hard to get an initial diagnosis under those circumstances. Given the possibilities for asymptomatic transmission and/or unknown/undiscovered vaginal lesions, the person you think you got it from may or may not be the source of your infection. 25- 30% of all sexually active adults have the antibodies for it.

I knew a man who was a celibate monk until he was 32, and caught it from a woman who he had sex with once- she did not know she had it until she was tested.

Sorry to hear that the statistics did not work in your favor.

Why does herpes have to be so taboo!!

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