Hey everybody

By Ducky Saturday, February 09, 2008

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Hi everyone,

I just thought I'd put forward a little story about myself since I just signed up. I also figured I should join some kind of group to discuss things with because this is very new to me!

So, to start off... I was diagnosed with Herpes Type 1 about a month ago, which is typically found around the mouth but, lucky me, I have it on my genitals. Fortunately, I have a very mild case which is actually lucky for me. I suppose the most unique thing about my situation is that I literally do not know where I got it from! I have only ever been with 3 guys (the first two were virgins), and I had been dating my last boyfriend for about 9 months, and I didn't show any signs until the last month we were together. I went to the doctor, and was diagnosed with herpes, he got checked out and was clean. Then he broke up with me (still don't know if its because of my mystery case of herpes or not... but shattered my self-confidence pretty hard) He got all the tests done and he didn't show any signs, on the genitals or the mouth. So unless he cheated on me, transferred it without having an outbreak and gave it to me, thats the only was I can think of! So, I am very, very confused as to how I got this!

Anyway, I have accepted that I have to live my life with herpes and I guess I just feel I need to connect with some people who are going through similar experiences. I am specifically concerned about future relationships, and how I am going to break it to someone that I have herpes. Sex isn't a main concern for me, but it is an eventual one. Maybe some positive stories about someone telling a new partner or some tips for me would be helpful.

Well, I've said enough. Hope to hear from some of you soon.

Megs

Am I having an outbreak?

Comments (8) | Add comment

CAM, Editor

2/12/08 12:31pm

Hi Megs, Thank you so much for sharing your story. My name is Camilo and I am a monitoring this site. While I am not a certified healthcare professional and cannot answer your concerns specifically; I can point you in the direction of some helpful resources to address your concerns. You have already taken what is the most difficult step for some, and that is seeing a healthcare professional to obtain an accurate diagnosis. I am sorry to hear about your recent breakup with your boyfriend, but it doesn't mean that there are no manageable ways to be a in relationship after being diagnosed with the virus. I think you should check out our Dating and Relationships page, it will have suggestions on addressing dfficult subjects with your partner regarding the virus. We also have a very helpful Just Diagnosed page that can help answer many of the questions you may have regarding your recent diagnosis. In addition, we also have a Drug Information page that has helpful information about the drugs that you may have been recently prescribed.

CAM

amber

2/16/08 3:20am

hey im amber and iam also new to this site and i just found out i have herpes about almost a month ago. The road has been a lil rough because i want to tell people so that they could be there for me. because in my situation i was forced to have sex with someone i just met and saw the bumps few weeks later. I cried so much the day i left the docters office i thought WHY ME? but you just have to be thankful at this point that its NOT something worse that could take your life.

I have told this guy that im falling for, actually i knew that things could get very serious because i like him ALOT and he likes me alot so i just felt like i HAD TO tell him. I broke down crying i kinda do that alot, and told him what happened. and hes still in my life and I THANK GOD because he was just concerned if he could get it and how and of course i told him EVERYTHING POSSIBLE. because someone forced this and gave this to me so i could never ever in my life do that to someone.

so just make sure whoever you tell will be there for you. KEEP THE FAITH AND A BIG SMILE.

Ducky

2/17/08 8:09pm

I hope I will find someone down the road who will be there for me and support to me like that person in your life has. I'm very glad for you :)

o321rick

2/25/08 10:55am

Good Luck with getting an answer. I posted on 12/16/2007 with specific questions and have yet to get a response. I've read the on-line descriptions about "abstinence is best" but that still doesn't offer realistic information for those that do have sex. I am blood test positive for herpes and apparently transmitted it to my wife yet I have never had any indication or sign that I have it or have an outbreak. I am beginning to think that maybe the "experts" really don't know enough about this virus and it's transmission to offer solid information and probabilities of transmission under specific circumstances.

Ducky

2/25/08 2:42pm

I'm not really looking to get an answer. I mean, I still don't know how I got it, but I have to live and deal with it either way. I'm sorry about your circumstance. I hope you find the answer you are looking for.

Dimples

2/26/08 9:01pm

Hey i dont want to use my really name but im 16 and i have herpes typw 2.Genital herpes and i just want u to know that i dont think u should tell the person you want to date you can have herpes and still have a health sex life,i feek like if u tell them and they are the type to put your busy out there.If may hurt you with your friends and maybe at work.All im sayin is that you can help your parten with out tellin them.Soap and water befor and after sex kills the virus.You can type in herpes in to a web called "ask.com"and u can learn lot to help you.

Ducky

2/26/08 9:33pm

I think what I got from your reply is that you shouldn't tell your partner about your herpes. I'm almost positive thats not what you are supposed to do. I mean, it isn't a 100% chance that they are going to contract it, true, but you shouldn't keep them in the dark about it. If you are in a new relationship, and they don't like what they hear, well, they aren't worth it. Also, about friends and co-workers knowing, well they don't have to. You should tell your sexual partner and thats it, so a nasty rumour doesn't spread.

I sympathize with you because I am also young and living with herpes, but I don't think that its wise to keep it from your partner. It isn't fair to them or to yourself.

concerned 1

6/ 3/08 12:17am

I totally agree with you about sharing it with your partner! How can you not, Herpis is a virus that can be easily spread. If you've had the chance to look up iformation you've probably read that there is a (shedding phase) NO SYMPTOMS at all and still pass the virus....so why risk that! And this is supposed to be someone you care about and trust! That really says alot about you as a person and i hope and pray theirs not alot of yous out in this world!

Hey everybody

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