Finding out

I have been living with genital herpes for a little over 3 years.  Trust me that it has been the most difficult thing I have ever had to deal with and just like you, I too will never know who gave it to me and have cried many of times feeling "damaged".  A few months after my results, I met someone.  As we became close, I felt the need to be honest.  It was the 2nd time I had said it aloud and to my surprise being honest did not change one thing.  We are still in a relationship and find that communication is the key.  Learn what makes your body breakout and do research together.  If the person loves you, this information will not matter. I haven't had as many outbreaks as the first year.  Believe it or not, it does get better overtime and you begin to forget and live life normally.  I do not take the 1 pill a day.  I personally feel that treating my breakouts as they come works better for me - plus your body does not become immune to the medication.  I guess that's a decision you'll have to make for yourself. Perhaps write a journal during your breakouts to record patterns - then you'll learn how to avoid or what causes your breakouts. I think my biggest challenge today is to continue to remind myself that I'm not a bad person or "damaged goods" because of my disease.  I am (and you are) just as good as anyone else! Hope this was helpful.  In a way you have helped me too!  thanks!

i have suffered with herpes for over 12 months but unfortunately it appears every month a week before my period is due, i have tried suppressive therapy and unfortunately after about 6 months of taking the tablets the first month i stopped it came back ...... so the doctor recommended changing my pill to the mini pill as it could be caused by a hormonal imbalance so this month i decided that as it had been a few months since the change i would stop the suppressive therapy and guess what ...... it came back :( so i guess it will be another trip to the doctors to see what else i can try as i am not keen on taking tablets for suppressive therapy for a length of time but cant live with it coming out every 4 weeks as it has been for the past 12 months or more .... unless anyone has any other suggestions ????

You sound just like me. I only found out this Monday. I was with someone for two years and after we broke up I got tested for everything. This is the only thing that's positive and I've been going crazy ever since. I've told two people, both potential mates but we were just in the getting to know you phase. One of them says it changes nothing for him and he hopes to still pursue a relationship with me. The other says it definitely changes things for him but he still calls and IMs to check how I'm coping, he's very angered by it and hates the guy who did it. I'm just happy to have found this site and I'm looking for better days, don't know how but I just hope one day I won't think about it every second of every day!

I moved back in with my E-husband. almost a year later after he found he had herpes,a blister came up on him. as for me I have yet to have a break out. I wak every morning with HERPES on my mind every single day chick. I CRY everyday,if not all day. I'am 41 years of age.and I do not love my ex-husband anymore,and feel stuck because of this disease. I do not want to DATE,because I do not want to go thourgh all this SHIT of telling anyone. I feel NASTY even when I get out of the shower. I do not have the urge to want to have intercourse any more. I feel like my life is over.then I about people that are sickr then me and feel bad for the way I feel about not wanting to live anymore. We as women (yes have sex even with men we do not know, because we are looking for LOVE) not actual SEX, but that is how men have made this situtation the ACT itself.(SEX). So therefore this is what we do. I feel you and me,and other people like us. I wished we hd a self help program in my area. BUT DON't.

I wished I could give you my cell #. but I do not think this site will let me.

I found out that I had HPV right as i was splitting with my husband.  I was so angry at him!  I was 28 at the time and thought I was damaged goods and no one wanted me.  When I told the guy I'm with now about the HPV, he was more worried about how this affected me more than himself. There are good Men out there, and life does go own.  He still thinks I'm beautiful and sexy, I'm so grateful to have him.

If you look at the statistics a lot more people have it than you realize, and it's by far not the worst thing we can have.  I'm not trying to make too much light out of it, but sometimes you have to get that mind set to move on.  My doctor gave me the Gardasil shot to protect me from other strains of the HPV so hopefully the situation is not complicated more!  (I have the genital warts...ugh) 

Take Care, and good luck!

Hi Guys...thanks to everyone for sharing their stories, words of encouragement, and even your venting. I was doing "just ok", but then I got my 2nd ob yesterday. Being a health care professional, I'm always reading and researching about things. I've read that some people get outbreaks around the time of their cycle. Maybe that's what's happening to me because I "feel" like my cycle is coming. It was irregular last month and also I stopped taking birth control pills since I won't be having sex any freaking time soon...that's another post though...lol. So I can only estimate when it's coming. Now I'm wondering if I'm one of those who will have an ob right around cycle time. If so, then what do I do??? Do I take suppressive therapy? Do I wait to see if this will keep happening? It's been a little over month since the last ob and I don't care to have them at all. So, I need some advice please!