Monday, March 16, 2009 Sandra asks

Q: Discouraged and alone

I just found out that I have herpes. I've had it for a long time. The guy I'm dating we had sex one time, and he developed sores. Does he have herpes now? He went to get tested,but they said he does not have herpes. Could it be too soon to tell? I was married for 13 years to the same man, and towards the end my ex-husband had some affairs.

I never knew that I had herpes until recently my date developed some sores in his groin area. And, I decided to get tested.

I really feel bad because I never even knew that I had it. Now, I must tell my friend whom I really care about this dreadful information. I hope that he does not get upset with me because I never knew truly that I was a carrier of herpes.

I'm in really in love with him, but because of this love for him I must be truthful and risk it all, perhaps losing him altogether.

Can u please offer some advice.

- A
- A
- A

Answers (2)

smartergal

3/20/09 11:39pm

I have heard that the first outbreak is the worst, and most painful. I would think that you would have noticed a lot of pain, hard to sit and a stinging burning sensation "down there" IF that was your first outbreak, that could mean he brought it into the relationship. My bf did the same thing, didn't think he had it, thought it was athletes foot but my dr says you don't get blisters with athletes foot. I had a real stressful situation in my life and blamo the herpes reared their ugly little heads!

Now I try to keep my stress down, and take my suppressive meds daily.

Good luck

alrighty

3/17/09 3:08pm

If he loves you and trusts you, he will be fine. A lot of people, up to 90%, don't know they have it. That is a testament to the fact that it causes very little, if any, interference with most of the people that have it. (the stigma seems to be the worst part for many). His test results are probably too soon for the antibodies to show up, it takes a few months I think. I would pull some of the info off of the internet to help with your conversation: like 90% don't know they have it and have essentially no symptoms; and that 20 to 25% of the population has it; and that it really boils down to a rare nuisance, if there are any repeat symptoms at all. this may provide him comfort.

Related Questions

See all questions

Important:
We hope you find this general health information helpful. Please note however, that this Q&A is meant to support not replace the professional medical advice you receive from your doctor. No information in the Answers above is intended to diagnose or treat any condition. The views expressed in the Answers above belong to the individuals who posted them and do not necessarily reflect the views of Remedy Health Media. Remedy Health Media does not review or edit content posted by our community members, but reserves the right to remove any material it deems inappropriate.

Q: Discouraged and alone

Related Questions

Ask a Question