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Q: Went to doctor yesterday to find out I have genital herpes. How often should I expect outbreaks?
I'm sorry you are going through this. To be honest it differs from person to person. I found out I have herpes about 2 years ago. After my first outbreak, I didn't have my second until 3 months due to stress. After that, I kept having them every 2-3 months, so I got on antivirals. I have only have one since being on antivirals. Some people have one outbreak and then none for years. But, some people never even know they have it because they don't have symptoms. Are you sure your current partner didn't transmit it to you? When I first was diagnosed, I was horrified. I thought I'd be alone forever. But, I was wrong. I have told two guys that I have it, and I'm married to the second guy I told. It didn't bother him one bit. I know its hard, but time will make it easier. To be honest, it is just an inconvenience at times. I rarely think about it. It gets better. Just have people to talk to during the hard times.
Thank you for your response. I actually have no idea when I contracted it. I am confused from all the things I have read online. Some places it says you could have it for years and not know it then one day have an outbreak. Then others say you get an outbreak a few weeks after being with an infected partner. I have been with the same partner for a year, but we are "friends with benefits" I do try to date as I am 37 and divorced, and yes I have stupidly had unprotected sex while trying to start a real relationship in the past year. So I have no idea what to think and when I got it. Is it possible to be a carrier and then one day for whatever reason you have an outbreak? And thanks for your advice on things to help with the outbreaks.
I am really sorry that you have herpes. It comes with life long issues. I was infected five years ago two years into a relationship where my partner assured me had no STDs. I really like this blog: http://consults.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/06/18/giving-your-partner-herpes/.
With me, I had at least six outbreaks my first year and about the same the second year but they were not severe on valtrex. I recently went to acyclovir because my insurance covers less and less; acyclovir is cheaper. The person who infected me does not pay my medical expenses-- I didn't seek personal damages. Unfortunately, I developed an autoimmune disease a few years ago (herpes may have caused) and now have monthly outbreaks that last 10 days. However, I am told that outbreaks normally get less frequent as time goes by for most people.
If you read the above blog, you will realize that even without symptoms you can infect someone with herpes. I think under normal circumstances one can work hard at not infecting their partner realizing there is no treatment that can make it risk free. Good luck to you and take good care of yourself.
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P.S.
To reduce outbreaks you can try lyosine or antivirals such as acyclovir. It has helped me so much!