I was diagnosed with genital herpes on my 18th birthday last year. what a great birthday that was. I haven't had an outbreak since... until now .. 2 weeks before my 19th birthday. Since I havent had an outbreak in almost a year, i kind of denied that i had it. I thought maybe i was misdiagnosed or it miraculously went away. you never actually want to believe the fact that you have this horrible disease. i have now been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 6 months and i feel that i have to tell him. we havent had sex yet, but i feel like i have to be honest with him. its so hard because he is a great guy and treats me better than anyone ever has and im so scared to lose him. how can you tell someone you love so much that you have genital herpes still expect the person to accept you and still feel the same way about you? im almost positive ill scare him away after i break the news to him. how can you love someone with genital herpes? i know if someone ever told me i would be scared away too. it just sucks when you yourself have it. im so young & now i have to worry about this for the rest of my life. i did it to myself and now im suffering the consequences. what should i do??
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hi hunny.
. i am only 20 my 21st is at the end of this month. i noticed some bumps there and though in grown hair( no way in hell can i have something bad) i went to get more birthcontrol and she became concerned about the bumps so she tested them. i was at my ex house who i am madly in love with though we are not together right now we are working on things and got the call while he was in the shower and i freaked i couldn't even CRY! how sad. i was in such shock!!!!!!!! i heard him get out and i called my aunt just before he did. she has had it for years and i fastly asked what do i do? how do i tell him? do i even tell him? she said if he is worth keeping and you want him and love him that much you will know what to say and he will understand. so i went into the bedroom and said babe i love you im sorry somethings happened please don't run out please listen to me first. and i told him and he said said come here i love you and im sorry this has happened but nothings going to change. we talked about it and he was ACTUALLY the one that told me the facts about it! i was so shocked and amazed.
BASICALLY what i am saying it that you if he means enough to you and you want him in the future he will understand. you have had it for a year now and know prob more than i do! so therefore you will know what to say and be able to answer any question just make sure you tell him before you do have sex and if not then better late than never. hope all goes well.
they do understand better than you think. the ones that don't are the ones that think they are players and can get anygirl
Believe it or not, the hardest part of living with Herpes, is the desperation, anxiety, shame, and depression you are feeling right now, not the infection itself. Since i was diagnosed, I have been in several relationships with different people, and have had several sexual encounters too. Every time someone is interested in me, right off the bat I tell them just like this " There is something you need to know before we go any further..." To tell the absolute truth, I have not had one person turn their back to me. They actually respect me so much more because of my honesty.
I guess, what I am trying to say, is that, most of the reactions you will get will be more positive than negative. I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, or what decision to make. That is completely up to you... but, in my experience, honesty in that department goes a long way.
If you chose to tell him... remember this. Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. Herpes is a nuisance, and you have to be alot more careful, but it does not mean you are not worthy of love. He might get scared... but how would you rather he find out, you telling him backed with facts and knowledge of your condition, or by seeing it or even worse, getting it himself??
think about it.
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