Can herpes make sex painful even without an outbreak?

I take Valtrex for outbreaks and have not had an external outbreak for about a year, but sex with my partner is paindful. is it possible to have an internal outbreak and be unaware of it? It does not hurt when I urinate nor do I have vaginal pain or itching. my doctor suggested that I change birth control which i have done several times with no positive effects. Lubrication helps alittle but I still end up being extreamly irritated during and after sex. I will sometimes wait a week or so to let myself "heal" (even though the irritation has subsided after a couple of hours) and still have the problem all over again the next time that I have sex. any answers or suggestions?