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Funnyx,   Allow me add to the answer already given.  Okay, so you seem to have educated yourself fairly well, but like you, I too had these same questions.  Doctors throw around terms like "increasing your viral load", etc., but where and what do the actual studies show?  If you can take the medical jargon, do a google search for pub med, then type in hsv-2, or herpes, or asymptomatic shedding into the search box.  This site allows access to abstracts of articles that have been published in scientific journals, and is THE SITE for medical researchers.     Here is my two cents: You've got it, sounds like your partner does too.  The first thing you have to realize is that 70% of ALL herpes infections are the result of asymptomatic shedding (apr 2008 American Journal Obstetrics & Gynecology).  Your established sites secrete active virus, period.  This does not bode well for someone you're with that is not infected, especially since you (like myself) present in an area that can not be covered by a condom.  Another recent study (march 2008 Sexually Transmitted Diseases) tested Valtrex with regard to asymptomatic shedding.  84% had no shedding while on Valtrex, and 54% had no shedding while on placebo.  This means that while Valtrex is effective at reducing shedding, it does not prevent it.     So everyone responds differently to viruses, medications, foods, etc.  These severe cases you've seen online, while very unfortunate, are not the norm with regard to herpes presentation.  These individuals likely were exposed to a decent amount of the virus, and it (the virus) found numerous sites to enter the skin.  Usually, most people don't even know they have it, which is why, in its evolution, herpes has become such an effective virus.  It seems that once you're infected through a break in the skin, the virus takes up residence in the nerves in the area, and thus a "site" is established.  Your body combats the virus, but herpes wins this battle and becomes a chronic infection with or without reoccurrences.  Antibodies to the virus develop, and it is thought to be this process that keeps you from having more blisters develop in other areas through subsequent exposure.  Take chicken pox (another herpes virus) for example.  You get it and have an outbreak.  You're still exposed to this virus quite a bit throughout your life, but you only have the one outbreak.  Some people, but not all, experience subsequent outbreaks, usually later in life, that are commonly called Shingles.    Now this brings us to the meat of your question.  You want to know if your outbreaks, or herpes in general, will get worse if you have sex with a partner that is also infected.  My personal experience is no, but there are considerations.  I have had sex w/o a condom with the woman that gave me herpes countless times...no additional blistering (I've only ever had three blisters).  In theory, this makes sense, but like I said before, everyone is different.  I have read cases where individuals that have had outbreaks (always in the same site) later developed herpes on the fingertips (herpes whitlow), and other cases where HSV-2 popped up on the mouth as well.  Perhaps they had an infection there all along and it just never presented, or perhaps they were infected with a different strain...who knows.    I tend to think that if you are sure yours and her strains are identical, it is unlikely that you would develop new sites.  I would not, however, risk oral sex either way...no sense in adding insult to injury.  I would not have sex if either of you is having an outbreak either.  I would take Valtrex, and continue to search the literature with regard to these questions you have.  Medical science doesn't have all of the answers...individual variation makes this impossible, thus I think it is good that you pose these questions to "the community", which is comprised of people like ourselves.  I can only speak from my experience about this, and please note that I am not a doctor, just well-informed.  I recently posed a question similar to yours on this site (infected partners and sex w/o a condom, was the title).  It was answered today by Healthgal...look for it under recent questions.  Healthcare professionals will always give cautious advice, and this is understandable, but I think if you are smart you can avoid any further complications.      As for the asymptomatic shed-kit, though good in theory, it will likely never happen.  Also, herpes is likely the least of porn stars' concerns.