Petrified I may have Herpes. Scared about spreading it to family. Please help.

I have been with the same partner for almost 13 years.  I was sexually active prior to that though with multiple partners.  I have had a vaginal bump that got infected and in the past have been diagnosed with folliculitis.  I have another one now that started out as a "small ball" under the skin that has opened with bloody drainage and it is more painful than before.  I am petrified I may have Herpes instead of it being folliculitis. I am unable to see a doctor at this time due to finances and no insurance.  I have 2 small children in my care.  I have heard how cotagious Herpes is if you touch it then touch another part of your skin and I am petrified that i won't get it all off my hands then touch my babies and pread it to them.  I am having panic attacks and am scrubbing my hands and pouring alcohol on them before i touch my babies.  Is it that contagious?  Do i need to be as viligant?  Can they get it from sitting in the same chair that i do or on the same toilet?  Please help...