I WET AND MESS TOO , I WORK AS A JANATOR SO SOMETIMES WHEN I BEND OVER TO CLEAN SOMETHING PEOPLE SEE MY DIAPER , AND POINT , I STOP CARING AND I OPENLY  BUY MY DIAPERS AT WALMART 4 AND 5 BAGS AT A TIME , WE ARE HANDICAPED TOO , WE SOULD DEMAND DIAPER CHANGING TABLES FOR ADULTS A COMFORTABLE PLACE TO CHANGE .

I CAN GO HOME TO CHANGE COZ I ONLY LIVE 2.8 MILES FROM WORK , I JUST STUFF TOLIET PAPER IN MY DIAPER AFTER I DUMP OUT THE BOKE OF THE PROBLEM SO I DO NOT GET DIAPER RASH AND I PUT LOTION IN THE DIAPER THAT FELL COOL , I USE EQUITE LOTION UTRA . I HAVE SLIGHT CASE OF CP ? AND I HAD AN OPERATION ON MY STOMACH 12 YEARS AGO

Hey Nicole, I can't say I know what it's like to live with incontinence as I never have, but I do know very much what it's like to be different. I'm a guy old enough to be your father and I've had my share of problems including kidney malformation, a hole in my heart, a narrowed ureter from the one good kidney to the bladder, and more. The result of this is what I consider being somewhat physically challenged, socially challenged, and emotionally challenged as I also am dealing with ADD and depression and anxiety. To put it in a nutshell, there are scars that run deep and still have profound affects on me. It's fairly easy for me to say this, but as an adult learning to accept what you can't change and learning to cope with it is best thing. While it's great to be discreet about your incontinence, you shouldn't have to keep it a total secret. I think it's a good idea to let a few select friends, including those at work know of your problems. Those who care, will be compassionate, and understanding. The benefit to this is when something unexpected happens such as illness, an unexpected trip to lunch, an accident, etc. there will hopefully be someone there that is aware of your situation, and can help. It's also a lot less stressful for you in a crisis if there's someone there who already knows who can help/support you, than everyone finding out for the first time. The h--- with anyone who has a problem with your incontinence. Stand tall, keep your chin up and be proud of who you have become! BTW, part of what I'm dealing with has to do with a father who was really tough on me. His way of teaching was correct and criticize rather than help and encourage. My mother sometimes associates this with psychological abuse. I hate to think of it that way as my dad had a good side to him as well. If your relatives are still acting inappropriately, I feel for you. If it was when you were all kids and teens, you have to let it go and write it off to immaturity. Remember that we are so programmed in our society that everyone must have control of their bladder and bowel unless there is an obvious reason for it such as being paralyzed, and so much shame is associated with having accidents that it can also be embarrassing to you, but to others around you. Keep in mind that sometimes what you might consider a negative reaction is someone who is not sure of how to respond, afraid that they will embarrass themselves or you. Consider that unless it is outright rudeness, or is clearly an inappropriate response.