I am not a professional anything so the information here is just my opinion. I have come to believe that if it works and is not illegal or immoral then do it however If it is harming you or your ability to live a happy productive life than seek help.  The other thing is this; you may think you want to be incontinent.  It is one thing to wear diapers because it fulfills as emotional need, but it is another thing altogether to have to wear them because you have no control over your bladder or bowels.  I think if you feel you need to justify wearing them, it seems to me that the emotional need alone would be enough, besides it is no one's business what under your clothes are why you choose to wear anything that you choose to wear.  A word of advice "lose lips sink ships" (be very careful whom you let know of your secrets, some people have little or no respect for anyone if it comes to passing around some gossip not care about the damage that it could cause to someone even a friend!) It can't hurt to get some counseling though; you might find your reasons are deep inside just waiting for you to work through them.