I have complete bladder and partial bowel incontinence and I have dealt with leaks and found what works (for me).

To answer your questions the best pull-up is the Abena Abri-Flex protective underwear. These work well for a "pull up", but it is still just a "pull up".

For night time leaks you will have to wear a quality diaper...period!

I have tried every possible option, and found that if you use a "standard" quality diaper as soon as you sleep on your side you will leak (unless you use a very good booster pad).

I personally prefer the Abena Abri-Form briefs for night time (or daytime extended wear) use, and I rarely have issues with leaks.

I found that if you put a booster pad over your penis (with it pointing down) and then your diaper it is VERY rare that you will leak, the drawback is that this combination is expensive...but it works, and works very well.

As a matter of fact I have found that if you use a high quality booster pad even with the Attends with waistband diapers it works very good for leaks as well, but you might have to change during the night, but with the Abena's you can go all night without changing due to leaks.

I have never worn cloth diapers.

Before you give up on the idea of cloth prefolds, you might want to look at the products from this company:

http://www.changingtimesdiaperco.com

They also sell, in the 'miscellaneous' category, an item called the Snappi diaper fastener.  It's designed for kids, but the larger model actually works quite well on adult size diapers (I have used it on the website's XL size prefold).  It looks a little weird, but it is so much faster and (generally) less potentially painful than pins.  Also, oddly enough, less 'babyish'.  Really good stuff.  I've used Abena's top-tier disposables before, and the cloth diapers, under waterproof pants work at least as well and cost quite a bit less.  Obviously, the Abenas are best for travel and whatnot...

RJ