To get ready for a romantic Valentines Day, remember these tips:

--Engage your senses. Wear silky underwear. Get a soft and sensual blanket and don't be afraid to let it touch parts of you that deserve touching. Put on music that puts you in the mood and light candles. Move your body slowly, rhythmically, like you used to when you were 20. Walk slowly, be mindful of your body's movement.

--Tell your partner what you want. It's ok to be a little shy--whispering can get your message across in more than one way.

--Lubricate! If you don't have an estrogen cream or vaginal ring, or even if you do, go to the pharmacy and buy yourself some Astroglide or something similar, and use it liberally, on you and your partner. Giggle about it, if it makes you a little self-conscious. He may think that's cute.

--Don't rush. We are so used to rushing the kids to school, rushing to work, rushing here and rushing there, that sex can seem like an imposition. Plan an evening with nothing on the agenda but romance. If you can get things started before he walks in the door, even better. Turn down the lights and light some candles. That sends the message loud and clear.