Nutmegan,

I hope you don't mind me being using your father's name for you!  No you're not crazy, well, probably not.  Just a willing family member who wants to get everyone together and no one else seems to have the good heart to do it.  My neice at Thanksgiving hosted 23 for dinner in her tiny 900 square foot house, bless her heart.

You are on the right track.  Your planning ahead, getting some things done ahead of time, planning breaks.  My neice did layout a very nice time line to help keep her sanity and dinner on track.  You might want to try that.  Nothing didn't get in the oven at the right time.  Also don't be shy, everyone, adults and teens alike can help with clean up.  Tables have to be cleared, garbage taken out, pots cleaned afterwards.   You and your husband do not have to do all of that.  I personally remember the feeling of community doing all of that together growing up in a large family brought us.  Share that togetherness. 

My boyfriend has a daughter that practically has to be pulled into the kitchen with ropes, but we no longer let her sit and be waited on.  She isn't happy, but she keeps coming back, so she can't be too upset over having to help!!

I hope you have a wonderful family gathering.  Good luck and let us know how it turns out!!

Cindy