The crowd is here! We had a very nice day with them all yesterday - today we have two noisy toddlers and their parents in addition to all who were here yesterday. Christmas gift giving is over and 17 members of my family are running around downstairs, making music, playing, preparing dinner for later, and I have taken myself away to the relative quiet of my room.
Danny made caffeinated coffee last night with dessert - a mistake due to guests putting the coffee back in the wrong place and Danny not checking. I had about half a cup before he realized he had made the wrong kind. It kept me up well past 2. Then the kids getting up this morning and tiptoeing around downstairs ended my sleep at 7:30. My room is right over the kitchen and family room and sound really travels. I woke exhausted and could feel the beast hovering around my left temple, ready to strike.
So I decided I'd stick it out until after the gift-giving, and then head up to my room until dinner. I didn't want to miss it, and if I took the abortive and stayed down there, it would be a waste of one of my precious imitrex. (Insurance only allows me 4 per month - I get the 9 pack and pay for the 5 more out of pocket - that is a giant ouch to the wallet every month).
18 people crammed into our tiny living room, opening presents. Laughter, talk, so many things to look at, the toddlers wanting to bounce on their new hop-balls right in the middle of everything, my kids demanding my attention every other minute. I kept quiet, though my irritability was rising. Everyone was really well-behaved; I know it's just me and my sensitive head. Everybody happy, and I can take care of me now. I just took an imitrex and am laying low. I need to let go... of missing out on the fun; of worrying what people will think of me; of the fear that someone will break something; of concern that Danny will forget some important element of the dinner; of being in any kind of control of the day or the dinner. Pray that the imitrex works this time, works well, and that the dull pounding pain gets no worse. Let go and let God.
- Nutmegan
