Whining about Topamax side effects....

I freaking hate this drug..... I have been on Topamax for eight days and it is already driving me nuts!

The tingling in my finger tips is annoying, but I can live with it.  The neuro who prescribed told me to take potassium, and I noticed when I take a 99mg a day it goes away. Fine.

And the coginitive difficulties, frustrating but maybe I could cope with my IQ dropping 40 points for the next couple of months for the hope of my migs finally going away.  To give you an idea, my two favorite idiot moments thus far.... spelling"curl" as in  to curl hair , "C-I-R-L" and forgetting how to spell "distribution" halfway through the word....

But here are two new fun side effects that I am pretty sure are correlated to this stuff screwing with my birth control pill.  One, breakthrough bleeding.  Okay, this is a minor inconvienence.  It is really light and most of my panties are black so I'm not stressed.  Two, I have been so depressed the last two days I barely want to move.  I don't want to do anything but curl up in my bed under the covers and sleep for a month.  Everything seems like a hassle.  In fact, the only reason I am even online this morning is because I have bills that need to be paid (and no matter how crappy I feel I am still a grown up. ).  

See being depressed even a little bit upsets me because I have clinical depression.  I pay good money every month for my Lexapro to not feel this way.  And I can tell the difference between being cranky, and something really not being right in my head.  When my hormones get screwed with it aggrevates my depression, which is one of the plethora of reasons I have to be on birth control in the first place....

I hate this drug so much.  I am only up to 50 mg and they want me to go to a 100mg.  No way. The only reason I am going to stay on this crap another minute is so I can at least say I tried.  

Well, thanks for listening to me throw my temper tantrum.