everyone I love is "done" with these headaches they think I do it to myself

honey, send them on to me.

my family will tell you that you can tell a day or so before that a migraine is on the way. i might as well grow horns, and i know i become that little word the rhymes with witch.

i average 1 bad one a week now with prevenatives. it used to be 3 or 4, with some of them running together.

the only aadvice i can give you is to take the meds as soon as you feel any pain. and if all else fails puke on them a few times ( hey it worked with my boss, i haven't heard another word about having to leave when my head gets to that point)

Hello, and welcome to MyMigraineConnection.com!

Well, your family and friends wouldn't be "done" with you if you had a different chronic illness such as diabetes or epilepsy, would they? Migraine is a genetic neurological disease caused by overactive neurons in our brains and genetics. We are able to manage Migraines, not "cure" them. If your doctor isn't able to help you, it may well be time to consult a Migraine and headache specialist. It's important to note that neurologists aren't necessarily Migraine and headache specialists. Take a look at the article   Migraine and Headache Specialists - What's So Special? If you need help finding a Migraine specialist, check our listing of Patient Recommended Migraine and Headache Specialists.

Please have your family come read our site. They will soon see you are not "doing" anything to yourself. That is absolutely craziness. We have lots of people here who are going through the same thing you are and will be happy to share their experiences with you.  

I know how easy it is to feel as if you've tried everything out there, but there are so many medications that can be used for Migraine and headache prevention that it's literally impossible. You can find a list of potential Migraine and headache preventives in Migraine preventive medications - too many options to give up!

Thank you for creating a SharePost. SharePosts are a form of blogging, and there are many things you can do with them. You can share an experience, suggest something that's helped you, use SharePosts as a Migraine and headache journal, and many other things.

We also have a discussion forum that you may want to check out. Especially if you have questions or are looking for information, you may find the interaction on the forum to be quite helpful. To get to the forum, just look for the orange box marked "Manage" and click on the Migraine Forums link. Because our forums are maintained by a third party, you'll need to register for the forum. You can use the same information you used to create your community log-in if you like. If you want to go directly to the forum, you can click HERE.

Along with your personal "My Home" page and the discussion forum, you'll find links to a great deal of helpful information and a spot to sign up for our free newsletter on the main page of our site, http://www.MyMigraineConnection.com.

If you have any questions, please feel free to post them to the forum or send me a message through my profile.

Welcome again,

i have been dealing with migraines since i was 10...........33 now......but for the past ten years i have been getting menstrual migraines and the last three years they have forced me to quit work and file for disability......my neuro and gyno are at a loss of what to do for me.......blood test.......MRI......more blood test.....and i do it all that they say to do for migraines...........i have lost count of all the meds i have tried.....i don't know what to do either.......i know what my life will not support children.......when you are in pain all the time and your life is just about finding relief.......how in the world do i bring children into this mess.....so i have thought of getting a hysterectomy........or toobs removed.....i just know that i can't give up.......i have lost so much of my life because of being a women........i am sick of loosing about two weeks out of each month .........first i start to get point pain.....then dizzy for three days......then a severe migraine that can last for a week.....then i feel week and my eyes hurt so bad that i want to remove then.......then it takes a about another week just to find the strength to get better and start my life again........plus i can't as even much kiss my husband and of course we can't make love........what a hell my life is.............getting real sick of this crap.......

ya.........i understand your pain...........i am their with you.............

stay strong

stay calm

stay positive

stay hopefull

Hun,

To tell you the truth, I think that they should understand what you are going through. And just ask them plain and simply if they honestly think that you would purposely want a migraine of all things come into your life. And, I know that this sounds a little harsh, but when one of your family members starts hurting in some form of way, and want your assistance and support. Tell them that they thought up of the pain, and they should make it go away..Or make the wound go away. That will fix them up pretty quickly...I have had my fair share of family members not believing illness that came up on me. But, when i told them that i didnt believe in the cut on their arm or something to that affect...they listened. That is only if you want to put them in your shoes, when you feel that way every single month. I do apologize that it happens to you. I have not have a lot of migraines in my life, and when i get one, i want to never get out of bed. Having them like you do must be a very big burdent to bear.

Mari1512,

I know your pain.  I have been to 17 doctors.  I can't even remember how many different meds I have been on.  I have also tried botox and acupuncture.  Nothing works. My husband seems to understand because he can see when the abortive meds don't work and I am throwing up from the endless hours of non stop pain. In addition to migraines I have a daily headache called hemicrania continua.  I cannot be in air conditioning because of this pain so this causes some problems in our household. We turn the a/c on for my husband but I must go to a room and close the vents and have the windows open BUT of course if rain is arriving and the barometric pressure is dropping that causes a migraine. My last neurologist made me count how many headaches I had in a month.  It was up to 20 out of 30 days with medicaiton. I have a headache all night and wake up every two hours. Luckily, if my extended family doesn't believe I am in pain, they don't let on. They know if I don't show up for family functions that I am down for the count.  

Oh, man! I think there are quite a few of us who have family or friends that "don't get it". It is very frustrating. I have my MIL who always says "we have to find you a good doctor" ok.....the doctor I see is amazing and is trying everything out there to help me.

It's frustrating enough to have someone not understand, much less someone who is not willing to understand or try and learn because someone they love is in pain. This really burns my toast!

I know exactly what you mean by hiding how bad it is - I do that too. Maybe not for the same reasons, but because I do not want to appear as weak or that I can't handle things. It's hard enough that my life has been flipped upside down by this disease, not to mention trying to just get through the day most days.

Have you seen your new doctor yet? I hope they have some new ideas for you. As Nancy said, I know it can feel like we've tried everything out there at some points, but with the list of preventives available to us, and the different combinations of medications - it is almost impossible to try them all! This is good though. This means we will keep trying. There is no cure, but there is managing Migraine. That means keeping a Migraine and Headache Diary to track frequency and track triggers. Making sure we get enough rest and fluids - which it sounds like you are already doing.

I know you mentioned your family is unwilling to be educated. Maybe printing out Migraine and Headache Education for Those Who "Don't Get It" , hang it on your fridge and highlight the things that are your triggers. I had a copy in my cubicle for a long time.

Please know that we understand what you are going through. A lot of us have been there. A lot of us are still there! You are not alone! We have a wonderful forum on our site, I'm not sure if you have been over there yet, but you can get to it by clicking HERE. We are very good at supporting each other here because we all know what it feels like.

I look forward to seeing you on the forum! Please stop in and let us know how your appointment went!

OMG! that is how it was with my family at first and then I went completely off on them! O yea they get it now! especially since I am breaking glasses because my left hand is so weak. And now that my left side of my face is numb they are surely feeling bad for ever doubting me! I am lucky to have a husband that has always believed me though he is great! But my mom and brother were very effy about it until now!!

Hang in there! Make sure your hubby goes with you to prove him wrong so he can help you with this illness.

If you are a believer, then keep praying!

Good luck on your appointment!

I am very sorry that your immediate family doesn't understand. My son is 25 and has no life, no job, and few friends because of his light sensitivity and migraines. It's bad enough when doctors aren't supportive, but having a family that doesn't believe you makes things so much worse. My son is fortunate to have a few close family members--grandma, sister, mom, & dad--who totally support him and believe. However, our family has been hurt terribly by family members whom we thought truly loved us. Instead, they revealed their true hearts when their gossip eventually led many to believe my son has a mental disorder! We tolerate some and have nothing to do with others. I'll pray your family will have their hearts and eyes opened so that you can have the support you need. Don't give up. 

Sincerely,

Concerned in KY