Hello!!!!

I do have a migraine today, but just "had a feeling" that I needed to check my email, and I was so wonderfully surprised to get your note.  I live only a couple of towns away, and can't get over how we came to connect (especially since I hadn't been on the site in soooo long, and it's the only one I actually have ever written to).

I also believe mold is a huge trigger issue for me, though I've never been tested.  I just know that when it starts to show up in my home (I have a well-sealed 60's ranch that is so air tight it is unbelievable) and also when outside mold counts get high, I am so much more susceptible to an attack.  Perhaps this is why the month of June and July were so bad for my head?!  It seemed as though I was constantly coming down with/experiencing/just getting over a migraine.  I actually ended up at the ER at South Shore Hosp last week because my rescue meds were useless for 3 straight days.  Thank goodness they were able to alleviate my pain and stop the nausea/vomiting.

Even though the mold count outside is high, I do try to keep up with my gardens (maybe only once every several days).  It's my "sanity time" when I can get outside of my pain and just tend to my gardens.  Of course, this is a challenging year for gardening, what with what all the excessive moisture has done for the plants and for aggravating the migraines.  Of course, it was different to tug weeds out while standing up because they got so high!

Also, I can relate like you wouldn't believe to finally feeling a little better, but then cramming in all of the housework that didn't get done while I was too sick to do it.  Where are the laundry fairies when you need them?  I do way more than I probably should when I am in a lot of pain (sometimes I half-heartedly believe it will take my mind off of the pain), but I am not the type that can live with too much disorder or clutter.  The guys in my house evidently can't see the mess, or are just better at ignoring it than I am.  Eventually, of course, I end up making myself worse, but I figure that I can't stop living or doing things all the time just because I'm in pain.  If I stopped living altogether just because I was in pain, I would never have a life at all.

Getting out to do things is tricky, for the reasons you mentioned.  Though I guess if I can do housework while in pain, getting out for a fun reason seems like such a better alternative.  I know that when I do get out, I feel better mood-wise afterward (even if I debated should I/shouldn't I beforehand). 

Thanks again for writing--it's a great feeling to find a kindred spirit.  Write anytime.

Hi there Headacut!

How I do love the name you chose to use, how adorable!  And doesn't it still sound appropriate for how a headache can make you feel?

So sorry to hear about your knee, (that's just a complete stinker--did you feel like you had a bullseye on top of your head by now?) and not being able to garden at all.  I know that gardening is genuinely my "mental health break", and to be denied even that must be such a great loss for you, emotionally as well as physically.  I understand what satisfaction there is when you can actually participate in something you enjoy, especially when so many of life's pleasures have been denied you because of your migraines.  Hopefully your knee will mend more quickly than the sciatica--just don't push and do too much too soon.  I know that the instant I feel even some improvement physically, I tend to jump in and do too much too soon. 

Let your knee heal well, and know that the weeds will be waiting for you (they always are, they're relentless).  On the bright side (?), everyone's gardens are doing miserably this year because of the weather, so just think of the strain and aggravation you saved yourself by being sidelined....I know I'm reaching here, but just go with it (bright sides are such necessary things in life at times).  In addition, some of your plants are probably molding (I know some of mine are) so the farther away from them you can get, the better.

Fall is my favorite time of year here in New England, hopefully the air will be clear, crisp, and beautiful--maybe you'll feel up to some fall planting that you will doubly appreciate.  Plus, in the fall you can check to see what actually survived this miserable summer, and plan for next year.  Of course, if you're anything like me, you'll think up some nifty things to try next year, or changes you'd like to make, but forget them all over the long winter.  If you don't already have one, a little wheeled cart you can sit on, that is low enough for gardening use, would be a good investment.  Being on your hands and knees while gardening isn't such a good idea after what you've been through.  I have a lightweight plastic one, the seat opens to a little storage area for tools, and when I think to use it, I just scoot along on it.  Much less painful on the knees.

While I think of it, thanks for the tips on relief products, I'm definetly going to try the sinus spray--whenever I get a migraine, my sinuses do feel full and painful, and this just might be something that could alleviate that symptom.  I usually try taking sudafed when this face pain starts, but keeping the nasal spray by the bed would be much easier.

Actually, when you mentioned waking with headaches, it reminded me of myself in spades.  After the car accident, I was waking every morning with horrible headaches, most times the pain was literally my wake up call.  My neurologist told me that morning headache symptoms are most definetly related to neck issues.  He suggested trying a firmer pillow, preferably a buckwheat pillow.  I found one online, and I have to warn you, it takes getting used to.  It is heavy, feels like it's full of grains of rice, but it anchors your neck and head in a way that gives your neck the support it needs.  But it is firm--like a rock.  I do miss the days when I could snuggle into a downy soft pillow.  Maybe you could just try switching to a firmer pillow.  I also tried the pillows that are thinner in the middle (with a sort of pocket where your head fits in) and edges that are higher and firmer to support your neck.  This is an easier pillow to travel with (mostly because it's so much lighter in weight), but I found the buckwheat pillow keeps the severe morning headaches under control better. I suppose you also have to take into consideration what type of sleep position you prefer to see what kind of pillow might be best for you.  It's worth trying if morning headaches are ever an issue.

In addition to the buckwheat pillow, I also have to sleep in a soft cervical collar.  And have been for four years now.  I can't tell you how glamorous that makes me feel in the evenings!  That collar also took some getting used to.  I'm even supposed to wear it during the day when my migraine symptoms worsen, and I do this when I remember to.  What is it about migraines that cause my brain to stop functioning and get all fuzzy?  Even if I'm in pain, and I have to go out for any reason, I do end up taking the collar off.  I don't know why it makes me feel uncomfortable to wear it in public.  I guess it just attracts too much attention, or I'm too self-conscious.  Of course, vanity rears it's ugly head, too. 

And yes, I was at the ER on that weekend, Sunday specifically.  So we both had a bad weekend at the same time, so maybe something we are both exposed to was a common trigger.  Weather pressure, moldy garden plants...we both live in coastal towns with the same environment.  So many possibilities...Maybe over time we can find patterns to warn us when to be on the lookout for an impending migraine and take cover!

Certainly, June and July were horrible both in terms of weather and migraines.  I had a June birthday (turned 48), and had all I could do to get out to a restaurant for dinner that night.  Luckily, we went to the Red Lion Inn.  I say luckily because I was able to switch my table to one in the adjoining dining room area which was emptier, quieter, and darker than the bar/cafe dining area.  What don't we do to try to accommodate having a life while having a migraine?  Sometimes migraines literally suck the enthusiasm and joy right out of life.  But, dammit, I was determined to get out and have some "fun" on my birthday--even if it pained me.  Oh, well, at least dinner was delicious.

Today was also what I call a "bad head day".  This was a day that called for rescue medication, which for some reason didn't really help until my second dose.  I knew a bad migraine was coming on when I got up today and the beautiful morning sunshine wasn't just unfamiliar, but it was also painful to look at.  Then the nausea started.  Of course, I had "big" plans for today--actually I just hoped to pull some of the most annoying weeds that spring to my attention when I pull into the driveway, mostly because they are now knee-high.  But it was a plan, and I was actually looking forward to getting a little something accomplished.  But the best laid plans....  I ended up taking my meds and being almost useless--though my husband did give me a ride to Shaws so I could get a little bit of marketing done.  For some reason, my kitchen didn't come with an automatic restock button.  Also not included was a chef and a scullery maid.  Oh, well.

Well, I think I've reached my computer screen limit on a bad migraine day (as opposed to a good migraine day?).  I guess tonight I truly do appreciate the convenience of corresponding online.  We can both write at our own convenience, and also when we feel well enough to be able to do so.

Take care, and I hope you had a better day, migraine-wise, than I did.

P.S.  Sorry to hear about your friend's off-putting response when you needed an ear.  I'm quoting Leo Buscaglia here, but "too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around..."  How true. 

Hi Headacut,

Would you believe this is my third note?  Wrote one off and on all day (didn't want to spend too much time on the computer at once) hit "post comment" and got a server failure notice.  Hit back arrow and got note back, tried to post again and lost it.  Bother.  Left computer to stew (mentally), reheat leftovers (writing about restaurants made me hungry), showered, and decided to try again.

Wrote again, hit cancel instead of "post comment".  Just not meant to be.  Had my husband make me a margarita (virgin because of my head, but great recipe we got from Scarlet Oak Tavern) and will try now.  Three times is the charm?

So sorry to hear about your deck--sounds like a nightmare, no wonder you're stressed.  And your poor husband, doing something so kind and thoughtful, and then have it come back and bite him.  Ouch.  And about your dirty (literally) little secret, I wish I had a good solution for you.

Perhaps you could artfully toss painting tarps over everything, except the path to the deck (you could use a shovel here) and tell the inspector you are painting/redecorating/hiding precious artwork that you don't want him to see :) 

I know what I'd end up doing--running away (literally, you'd have to limp away I guess).  Just let my husband handle the inspection process and I would not be home at the time.  Men are always so much less critical of other men's housekeeping.  It's a guy thing.  I do understand how it makes you feel, though.  We tend to be our harshest critics, but you did have a lot to deal with health-wise. 

As for the physical therapist, my husband took my son years ago to a great one in Hingham with a sterling reputation (works on the Patriots and Red Sox players), but can't remember his name.  Must be a sports medicine physical therapy practice though--how many could there be in Hingham?  Is there one from there on your list?

By the way, I loved your description of the current state of your garden, the wildflowers--I'm borrowing that description for a couple of mine.  Much easier on the brain than constantly stressing over what needs to be done in the garden to "fix" it.  Too much is the answer there.  Hopefully, once the cool, crisp, dry fall air gets here we can both get out into our gardens to recharge.

My buckwheat pillow is something I can no longer sleep without.  Though the first night I tried it, I wondered how I'd ever sleep with it!  I know because I've tried to sleep without it when I've had a bad head for several weeks straight and decided I needed something softer to lay my head on, and used a regular pillow.  The next morning the base of my skull, my shoulders, even my upper back were not happy.  I've actually done this more than once (slow learner) and always go back to my buckwheat pillow.  It really does support, but it is extreme in terms of hardness.  You have to press on it with your hand to get it just right, but then you're all set for the night.  The collar also took a week or two to get used to, but the added support actually feels good now at night.  I think when I am in pain I tend to hunch over and raise my shoulders--the collar around my neck makes the shoulders go back where they belong.  As for the latest in collar fashions, I actually use a long, soft, white tube sock, with the foot cut off, as a cover each night.  Not exactly sexy, but just in time for football season!  Your suggestions were hilarious, and we could come up with an entire line of designer collars that could be all the rage.

I haven't gone on the tuliv site yet, plan to soon.  I have tried feverfew (no results) but never tried the liquid.  I've tried so many supplements over the years, I lose track.  Right now I'm on a few different things, mostly because I gained weight due to various migraine med preventitives I tried, which didn't work and had horrible side effects, but now my weight is OK, so I'm sticking with them.  Go with what works.

The picture you saw was taken in front of the Black Pearl, which is in Newport RI.  Fantastic clam chowder, creamy, sweet clams, touch of dill.  Delicious.  We always stop in when we go to Newport.  Have you ever been?  It's worth the trip--lots to do, good food, little shops to poke around in, even a lobster pier.  The Black Pearl is located on Pickering Wharf, and yes it does have dining outside also, usually a tall ship moored nearby.  Great views.

My husband and I had lunch on the deck at Atlantica a couple of weeks ago, I usually have the ceasar salad with grilled shrimp, but I think I had the lobster roll this time.  We, like you guys, try to go a few times every summer, but have only been once so far.  The Red Lion Inn we've been to a few times already this summer, had outdoor dining on the porch, the weiner schnitzel (probably spelled wrong) is delicious, and I also like the filet mignon, and the salads are good too.  The chocolate mousse is my favorite for dessert, I can always finish it even when I don't think I can.  Been to Jake's in Hull for their fried clams, fried calamari, fried shrimp.  Best around, go there when you're hungry, you get a lot.  Also on the water, but no outside dining (you'd end up in the ocean).  Lately, with the heat, we've been having ice cream for dinner--Nona's Homemade Ice Cream in Hingham.  Absolutley a must-do next time you're in the area, made fresh, and the flavors change every few days, though the usuals are always there.  Plus there's benches to sit in around the square.  It's only 10-15 minutes from Atlantica, tops.

I've reached my limit at the computer (that means my margarita is gone--just kidding :)  Tried to condense all my previous notes that didn't go through.  I hope this all made sense, still have migraine after-effects.  Anyway, I hope you get this one, and hope you got to enjoy this beautiful day.

Take care.

See See it took out my paragraphs again!!!!   Y U U U U G H !!!!!  Must be doing something wrong

Hi Headacut,

Wondering if the deck police took you away?  Hoping you are doing well, imagining you took off on a spontaneous European getaway?  Imagining you waving from the top of the Eiffel Tower.  :)  I wish I was.

Actually, today the heat/humidity is brutal, my head aches (so what else is new?) and I'm on my second day with no meds (keeping rebound at bay).  Really wish today was a med day.  Too early for a stiffner?  Maybe one of those margaritas, but generously spiked--could I call it a fruit plate if I serve it in a bowl? :) 

Actually, I heard there was a chance of a shower today, hope it comes because my plants are panting, and there's no way I can brave this heat to go out and water.  The sun is too strong (ouch) and I fear I would be wilting myself in short order.

Anyway, write when you can.

Take care. 

Good morning Headacut,

Got up early today with my neck and head (yes, they're still attached, and don't I know it).  Didn't delete this message you sent yet, even though I wrote last night I guess my brain function has me going through my email bass-ackwards.  Oh, well, different systems for various levels of brain dysfunction. 

Your koi pond sounds great--I think I left off there last night.  All those animals must be great to watch--so relaxing.  We only had ducks this year (no pond in our yard), but they enjoyed the sunflower seeds.  Yes, the turkeys were great, I got some good pictures when they visited.  Their babies were adorable.  They've all moved on to the conservation land behind my woods now, growing up in wide open spaces, as the the Dixie Chicks say.  But we did have a baby skunk, first one in quite a few years, and yes, my dog Annie did find it, and yes, the smell is still in my kitchen and living room :)  She didn't get sprayed (go figure how that happened--angels, maybe) but the skunk sprayed near the house, and when the back door opened, in came that noxious odor, and in it stayed.  Febreeze and Lysol are the scents du jour, and hopefully it will dissipate soon.

Supposed to be hazy, hot, humid August weather today--what, the weather and the calendar match for a change?--such a New England summer, I've never known.  Hopefully, our beautiful fall weather will arrive, as scheduled.  First too much rain, now my gardens are wilting in the saddest sort of way (even the "wildflowers" are drooping--good time to yank them, they come up so easily).  Going to have to water tonight.  The slugs will be thrilled.

Got outside for a bit after I wrote last night, champagne glass in hand.  My oldest spontaneously invited some friends over for a bonfire (where my apple tree garden used to be--will discuss this at a later date).  He invited me to join everyone, and the night sky was spectacular--looked for shooting stars from the meteor showers, but couldn't find any strays (they peaked earlier in the week when it was cloudy).  He called his department so the fire wouldn't be an issue (he's 28, a fireman/medic), and it was fun.  Didn't stay out too long, the mosquitos are blood-thirsty little buggers. 

When I got into bed, don't you know as soon as my head hit the pillow, I realized I didn't put my collar on, sat straight up to get it, and yanked my neck out of whack.  When will I learn to get up by turning on my side and gently lifting myself up?  I tend to spring up like there is a fire drill (maybe that's why my son is so good at what he does?).  Getting the collar on at that point felt so good, I'll tell you.  Bad enough, the neck hurts anyway, now I go and pull a stunt like that.  It seems a bit better this morning, but I'll definetly be sporting my "gardening" neck brace today--let's see, how to dress this one up?  Don't want to put flowers on it and be attacked by bees :)  Spray it with "Off" to keep the bugs away?--but then the fumes will have me seeing in plaid.  Oh, well, I'll come up with something.

Hope you enjoy this beautiful summer day--the lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer are finally here.  Must make time to do something crazy before the summer is over :)  Have to put that on the top of my list.

Take care.

Hi Headacut,

Been down off and on with a bad head/neck/brain/etc. over the past week and a half. No fun. (MRI showed white spots in the front of my brain--had these in the last one, probably from migraine, but also showed no malignancy.  Yes, had the dye.  No music options this time, but it went by quick because I was so tired.  Didn't do the neck this time, just had that redone last year).  Today, I actually got out to water my thirsty plants, and enjoyed the cooler, drier air.  But I'm also dealing with major post-migraine brain fog, (it's especially thick this time, don't know why), so if I start not making sense, that's why.

I'm so glad you got out with your friend!  What an accomplishment.  I understand how difficult it can be to even commit to a date, worrying about how your head will feel in advance, and how excited you must have been to be able to get out.  What a genuine treat.  It's the kind of thing that happens so rarely for us. 

Sorry about the judgementalness you endured, though, that's really tough to take.  No need for that, really, at all.  And I have absolutely no patience for people who decide that other people "bring things on themselves", for whatever reason.  So not true.  It's hard enough dealing with migraine disease without adding a heaping dumptruck full of guilt and pressure to go all over it.  No, thank you. 

How are you dealing with the fertility issue?  Getting any help?  There are some great resources here in the Boston area.  Worth checking into.

How's the knee?  Have you started PT?

Your trips to the drive-in take me back.  Haven't been since high school.  Mostly because mosquitoes love me.  Funny how they will ignore my husband, but I'll get covered with bites.  Go figure.  Too bad about the cougher, though, it's pretty funny how she seemed to be intent on following you.  What are the odds?

What a coincidence that you also loved Mama Mia--it's my new favorite movie.  I didn't see it when it first came out--mostly because I'm not a huge ABBA fan.  My brother convinced me to rent it with him when I visited him last January--and I loved it!   I so loved the movie, I got it on DVD, and even put the soundtrack in my car.  Just listening to the songs takes me right back to the scenes in the movie.  Lately, with the tension of dealing with migraine disease, I only want to see "lighter" movies--nothing deep, dark, or depressing.  If I'm going to sit through a movie, I want it to leave me with a smile.  So for the past few years, my retinue of movies has been pretty limited.  Though I also saw the Harry Potter movies because I read all the books.  Still liked Richard Harris better as Dumbledore.

Your blueberry pie sounds yummy.  We don't pick blueberries, mostly because the birds get to my bushes well before I deem them ripe enough for picking.  But we do go apple picking every fall.  We make a day of it.  Visit one of the orchards on Route 2.  Nothing like biting into an apple right off the tree, having the juices just run down your chin.  And the views, the fall colors, really make it a beautiful day all around.  Something I can enjoy doing, even with a bad neck.  It's amazing how they do taste different when freshly picked.

So your husband used to drive you to the market on bad head days, too?  I usually get chauffered to the market myself for the same reason.  Sometimes (if it's only a few items) my husband is willing to go himself with a list.  But on nights I can't prepare dinner, we definetly do take out.  My husband doesn't like to cook, or prepare food in general.  Except he does like to make spaghetti sauce (and it's great).  We usually keep some in the freezer, but our supply is depleted. 

He also doesn't clean, or do laundry.  My husband constantly buys himself new things to wear, rather than throw in a load of wash.  And drop off his dry cleaning?  Not on your life.  He owns over 80 dress shirts (at last count, probably more by now)...we have so many because instead of getting them at the cleaners, he just buys one, takes it out of the package, wears it once, then tosses it in the hamper.  Drives me crazy.  I've given away dozens of his shirts over the years.  We just don't have the closet space.  Who needs that many shirts?  Plus, the expense is rediculous.  Not something we can afford now.  Clutter doesn't bother him at all, though.  He just walks around it, over it, through it :)  I've left a pile of fresh laundry on the couch to fold, left the room, and come back in to find him sitting on it.  Oh, well.

The last storm that came in occurred when my head was bad anyway, so it was just more of the same.  We are supposed to get the hurricane Saturday afternoon, so I'll be feeling that soon.  Rainy weather doesn't help headaches, that's for sure.  But we sure do need the rain.  Everything outside is getting crispy.  Wish it was only the weeds that dried up and died!

Your method of celebrating birthdays for a month sounds wonderful to me--your right, no worrying about feeling under the weather on your designated day.  What a great idea!  I'll have to mention it to my hubby--though he's not a big fan of birthdays or celebrations, in general.  He goes along with me (to some extent on the actual day itself,) but with not much enthusiasm.  I guess I could celebrate for the month on my own a bit--plan some spontaneous, fun things to do for when I was feeling well.  That could work.

Tonight we are off to the Music Circus to see Melissa Etheridge (we try to see a show here in Cohasset each summer).  We've already seen Diana Krall, but we had to go to Hyannis for that one (though it was great that Elvis Costello was there with her).  That was a great show.  Don't really feel up to going out tonight, but it's so close, I can leave early if I need to.  Plus, the summer is just blowing by.  If I don't do some fun things soon, it will be over and I'll feel as though I didn't get to enjoy any of it.  It's close to that enough, as it is.  So many pain days this summer.  Maybe the first frost will come early and it will help my head?  Just hoping.

Hope your enjoying the fall-like weather today (tomorrow's supposed to be even better).  Though with the storm getting closer--I'm sure you can also tell by how you feel when it's coming up the coast.  Hope you survive Hurricane Danny, and that your head does, too.  And your husband's neck.  I'll be thinking of you.

Take care.

Hi Headacut,

Your August sounds just like mine, pain-wise.  What a summer!  Can't say I'm sorry to see this past one go, but can you and I have a "do-over"?  Summers are so short here in New England, I'd like some days back to have some fun :)  (Or get into some mischief!--couldn't because I didn't have the energy from the migraines!)  Yesterday turned out to be day where the stress level went up, and my headache level matched it.  Finally, I broke down and took some pain meds, which took the edge off, and went to bed early. 

But then my oldest son woke me early this AM, told me he had to leave for work, and the dog was throwing up in the back yard, so I needed to get up to "watch her"!  Hello?  Yes, I still had the migraine (though not as bad), but I remember waking up thinking...does my head still hurt?...yes...I wish I could have just slept on longer so I wouldn't have to feel it...the dog is doing what?...why would I want to watch this?...but, I knew I needed to get up to keep an eye on her and let her back in the house, but still, seems you can't catch a break when you need one.  Anyway, Annie was already chewing grass when I got up, she came in, drank some water, and now she seems fine.  But what a start to the day.  By the way, we still had "skunk breath" from her up 'til a couple of days ago.  She used to be a champion at chasing down skunks, "protecting" her back yard and woods, but now that she's older, she's slowing down a bit (don't tell her I said so).

So, I've already tried the imitrex this morning, the pounding stopped, but still feel a strong head-achy feeling, and kind of out of it (if you know what I mean, and I'm sure you must).  I'm trying to see if I can get by without the pain meds (why, I don't know...some sort of tolerance competition?...how much pain do I have to be in before I buckle?...). But maybe the pain level will go down as the day goes on.  Hopefully.  Of course, what am I doing while in pain?  Laundry :)

Sorry to hear about your experiences with PT, that is a pain in the neck!  I can relate to trying to do something physically that you know might aggravate your condition...why do we do this?  And that "what do you do?" moment was there for you, too?  Yup, just like the bank lady.  See how many ways we suffer with migraines, exponentially?  Amazing.  Yes, I tried PT a few times, but the last time (after the car accident) it made my hands go totally numb, and I need those guys :)  So, it didn't help my neck, and the side effects stunk.  Who can hold a glass of champagne with their feet?  I suppose I could just get the bottle and use a looong straw :)  See how migraines force us to compromise? :)

And my neurologist gave me the same "not sure about those white spots, migraineurs tend to have them" line.  I love your white light theory, though.  But this past summer, when dealing with so much pain, I've been down in the dumps more than I care to admit. 

I need a vacation!  I am so overdue it's not funny.  But no camping for me...I joke that I'll only go camping if it's at the Ritz.  But a vacation is definetly not in the financial cards right now.  That little bit about not being able to work right now...

Boy, that railing sure turned into something else...and, technically, I guess, you're "living on the streets", albeit in an actual house, if the street is "supposed" to be that wide.  Such a can of worms.  These town by-laws are so strange.  And each town is different.  You just never know when you're going to get "caught" trying to fix up your house...go figure :)  My oldest is building a new deck on the back of our ranch (the old one rotted 5 years ago, my husband finally tore it down 4 years ago (I actually shamed him into doing this, I was afraid someone would fall through), and it was still on his "list of things to do".  He's a great guy, but he's also a master at procrastination.  Drives me crazy, that does.

Your childhood echoes mine in a lot of ways.  I also partook of spaghetti-O's (how many other migraine sufferers did?...maybe you're on to something?).  But stress was a major staple in my childhood homes.  That is a huge trigger for me to this day...now I just have to learn to live with it, instead of buckling under it.  Trying.  I just love when I get stressed out over something, and my husband tells me "just don't think about it".  That is just so helpful!!  Like I wouldn't if I could.  Pah-leez. 

Maybe that's why he can be such a good procrastinator--he doesn't think about things he doesn't want to.  Picks and chooses.  Oh, to have such a gift! :)  Really, I secretly (or not so secretly now) do wish I could just "choose" to not be upset about some things.  But since my stress-filled childhood, I'm now "hard-wired" into a naturally occurring stress response (don't you just love the psychological psycho-babble?).  Good thing I majored in psychology--it comes in handy when analyzing yourself! 

My 17 yr old loves to joke that it's called psycho-cology.  Actually, he just started school yesterday, and he's taking the class--can't wait to get his "read" on things.  He has such a funny, dry sense of humor. 

So, any big plans for September?  We'll be going apple picking, of course (day trip).  And I'm going to an Omega seminar in Boston Sept 25-26 (if the head doesn't interfere).  Figures there's a retrograde mercury in Sept., I know that will screw something up--I can count on it.  I signed up for it on a whim months ago, not knowing at the time that the migraines would get as intense as they did this summer.  We'll see.  No, I've never gone to a blueberry farm, just used to pick the ones that grow wild on the hills under the high-tension wires.  Those blueberries are everywhere in MA.  The recipe sounds yummy, and I'd love it.  Thanks.  I also don't like "too-sweet" pies.  The natural fruit tends to be sweet enough for me.

Well, my computer time-limit is reached for today.  Thankfully, the head is no worse for it (thank goodness for the little things). 

Take care.

Hi Headacut,

Doing anything fun today?  I just finished weeding (started yesterday) and now my gardens are almost weed-free.  Such an accomplishment :)  I had a bad head yesterday, took the imitrex (that didn't work as well as it usually does), took a couple of tramadol later, that didn't help much, then decided "what the heck, if I'm going to be in pain, I'm going to pull weeds".  Go figure out the logic in that one!  My husband kept trying to get me to come back in the house, telling me I was "doing too much, I'd hurt myself", but I was determined to take my mind off the pain, and get something useful (to me, anyway) accomplished for a change.  Plus, the air was so beautiful yesterday.  I ended up sound asleep at 7pm, but I got almost 3/4 of the gardens done.  So, today I got up determined to finish the job.  I not only finished, I watered all the gardens, too.  If your going to overdo, you might as well go all the way...(ouch).

Sorry to hear you're in such pain from the PT (that is so not fair, isn't migraine more than enough pain for any one person? in a lifetime?).  I did my PT here at Cohasset Physical Therapy, or Cohasset Sports Therapy, something like that.  It not only didn't help, but made me worse.  My husband had good luck there, though. 

My blood pressure has been low my whole life, if it registers normal, that's high for me.  However, I did also have an incredibly stressful childhood, so I do think that's a trigger for future migraines, and future tendencies to be a worrier, too.  When you are a child, you should be nurtured and cared for, not dealing with adult-level (or adult induced) stress.  That would make any child worry, and once you start that cycle, I think it becomes ingrained, and hard-wired. 

And yes, I do tend to get more nightmares, and have more bad dreams in general with a bad migraine cycle.  Of course, since my migraines have gotten so bad since 2004, I rarely have what I would term "good" dreams.  They are either neutral, stressful, bad, or full blown nightmares.  After reading what I just typed, if I wasn't so tired, I would choose to spend more time awake :) 

Sorry to hear about your dog's diagnosis.  My heart breaks for you.  No wonder you had a nightmare, you don't even need a psychology degree to analyze that one.  Our pets are such true family members, and so helpless.  Their love is so constant, and their loyalty is so heartfelt.  My Annie had surgery a few years back (several thousand dollars worth--it's worth thinking about pet insurance if we ever got another dog some day) and I was a wreck.  But it all turned out okay, and I never thought twice about expense.  But going through cancer--wow.  That's a tough one.

So funny about men's pain tolerance--or their lack of it!!  My husband is the worst :)  Though, according to him, he never gets sick.  He's either (according to him) coming down with a cold (many days of sniffling, sighing, announcing the impending illness), "fighting one" (this takes several weeks of vigilance and effort, apparently, and hurculean feats of strenth), then having the actual cold (something close to bubonic plague, to hear of it), then weeks of "recovering" from this near-death experience.  And that's only a cold.  Amazing.  If he does genuinely have something seriously wrong, forget it, he gets it much worse than anyone else who ever had it, and how.  If our husbands got migraines, I can't even imagine the drama.  Men definetly have a low threshold for illness, and pain.  Though my oldest son, he's not much of a drama-king about pain (thank goodness, one out of three!).

Yes, the Omega is the one with Kornfield, though to be honest I never heard any of the speakers before (thought I'd try something new, and needed to get away, really).  Hope it's good.  I'm not much of a meditator, what's Kundalini?  Did some meditation with Herbert Benson at the Mind Body Clinic, but had the most success with progressive relaxation Cds and the ones specifically for migraine.  They are guided imagery by Belleruth Naperstack, she's wonderful!!  I did do a conference with her in Connecticut two years ago--it was amazing.  I'd do another one with her in a heartbeat.  Her website is www.healthjourneys.com and worth visiting, if you have any health issues at all.  I have a bunch of her Cds, and some of her books are good, too.

Funny you mentioned Wayne Dyer--I'm going to see him in Boston in November.  One of his PBS specials, the power of intention, I didn't like at all--couldn't even finish it, to be honest.  But then I saw, and liked, change your thoughts-change your life, living the wisdom of the tao.  And his latest special seems pretty good.  So I thought I'd get some tickets and take my hubby, maybe do dinner in Boston then see his talk after.  His reference about the knee surgery (I've used his same source in my psych class) didn't mean that the patients weren't in real pain during the follow up time--they genuinely were.  But after two full years, they ended up with similar results (some still in pain, some in the middle, some in no pain at all).  I don't think Dyer explained the full study very well.  Maybe just used the part that made his point?

Kind of like how some people claim that some useless "miracle" cures really work (my mother is always reading some holistic whatever, and telling me how to "cure" something--be it insomnia or migraines).  Maybe the placebo effect works for some people, but I question how "sick" they really were to begin with!  If someone gave me a fake imitrex--I would certainly not be cured of my migraine--only the real thing can make a difference to me. 

But the power of suggestion can be very powerful to some people.  I think my husband is one.  He believes that if he stares into the sun, it will make him sneeze--he truly believes this! :)  And, lo and hehold, when he stares into the sun, he sneezes.  But it doesn't have that effect on me--I guess I just don't believe it will happen as much as he does :)

Your right, though, about those "motivational" speakers that try to blame a disease or illness on how a person thinks, or behaves, or feels, etc.  I have no patience for them.  They are completely useless, as far as I can tell.  Though I do believe, as some one else once said (can't think of who to save my life, maybe lincoln? ), people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.  I do tend to be optimistic, my husband is the opposite, and sometimes that's a tough mix.  Especially when I'm really not feeling well, his negativity seems really abrasive to me.  Not that I can't get into a good snit now and then (oh, I sure can) but in general, I'd rather take a positive approach to things. 

I guess that's why I'm the one who ends up getting tickets for whatever we end up doing, or trying something new--if I left it up to him, we'd go out to a movie once or twice a year, and that's it.  Though since the bad migraines, I definetly don't do much.  My life is pretty dull, actually, all in all.  But I try to spice it up now and again by doing something new or different once in a while.  Can't let migraines drain the life out of my life too much!

I loved your fortune cookie!  Actually, I always open and read mine, they can be so funny (and sometimes so true).  I saw a reprint of one that said "You will tap dance your way into the hearts of millions!".  I kept that one on the wall of my garden shed--it makes me smile whenever I read it.

As for TV, I didn't know a single show you mentioned, except for Ghost Whisperer, I've watched it a few times.  I watch more TV now than I used to, but not many network shows.  I watch the news, PBS, and movies on TV.  I watch The Office, 30 Rock (opposite Ugly Betty, I know, because my mother watches U.B.)  But I'm usually in bed for the news at 9:00, then to sleep.  But, as you mentioned, I usually wake up more tired than when I went to bed (maybe negative dreams are more exhausting?).  And I'm an early riser, usually between 5 and 6am.  If I sleep til 7, it's a miracle.  I've tried sleeping later (especially on those occasions when I have a really late night), but after an hour or so of tossing and turning, I give up.  I've never been able to get back to sleep. 

We definetly follow the Patriots, and get pizzas from Lynnwood Cafe in Randolph for the occasion (far, but worth the trip for authentic barroom pizza).  We just can't find another pizza that compares to those around here on the coast.  Used to go to the Town Spa in Stoughton, but they moved to a bigger place, and their pizza, while still good, is just not as good as it used to be.  Now Lynnwood's is the best.  Hubby and I went there for a treat this past weekend, and their pizza is mouth-wateringly great (it's the only thing they offer) with their ice cold draft beer.  Yum.  Oh, back to the Patriots, I have to re-learn most of their names each season.  But the games are fun to watch, and I'm a big fan of Superbowl commercials.  I love Sunday games, they break up the day, especially once it gets cold and grey outside.

Thanks for the pie recipe, I'll give it a whirl when it gets cool enough to bake again.  Of course, that means I'm counting on feeling well enough to do baking (see that optimistic side?).  My youngest just asked about dinner--what--he wants dinner?  What is this about feeding your family?  He's assuming, of course, that I actually got to the market this weekend.  Doesn't he know I spent the last two days doing the weeding :)  Next thing you know, he'll expect clean clothes :)

But, now that's he's mentioned it, I'm famished.  I'll have to go scare something up out of the kitchen, or maybe (better) get hubby to order take out somewhere.  And, of course (hubby was right) my neck and shoulders are killing me, head's still bad but not worse than it was.  And, I'm too grubby, still covered in dirt, and goodness knows what else, to go out somewhere.  We were supposed to get some lobsters and cook them on the grill to chill for tonight's dinner.  But I forgot to remind hubby, and now it's too late in the day to cook and get them chilled in time.  Bother.  And I had the dijon sauce all made and chilled, too.  Double bother.

Well, I'm off to feed the family.  Or plead for take out, whatever it takes.

Hope your Labor Day weekend was a good one.  Great deck weather!  Maybe you should take a bevie out on the deck and watch the clouds go by?  My deck is almost framed, and I can't wait for it to be finished.  Poor Annie can't understand why she can't go out the back door in the early mornings (four foot drop if she stepped out).  Of course, that means I have to let her out the front door (it's sometimes still dark out) and I walk her out back with a flashlight (don't want a re-spray from the skunks).  Of course, here's hoping I don't find them when turning the corner accidentally before Annie does!! (sorry, Annie).  Imagine that!  There I am, bathrobe on, slippered feet, sooo attractive with my bed head.  What a sorry sight for the neighbors and all the traffic out front (thank goodness it's still dark).  If I got sprayed on top of it all, I'd make a sight worthy of America's Funniest Home videos (at least my family is still asleep then and wouldn't be filming my antics).

Oh, yeah.  Dinner.  Just got "the look" from the hungry one.  Gotta go.

Take care.

Hi Headacut!

Wow, seems like forever, you're right.  I was in Marshfield yesterday, at Halfway Cafe, and thought of you.  This is only the second time I've been there, had the clam strips--don't.  I also adore cajun food.  Once took one of those cooking classes, with The Cajun Yankee (don't know if it's even still in business) and fell in love with tasso.  Used to have to drive to Cambridge to get it, but found a place across from Mass General Hosp. that sells it.  Haven't been able to find it around here.  Any recommendations?

The past few months have been rough head-wise.  That, of course, impacts everything, especially since my family got sick of me being sick and were not just unsympathetic, but got pretty nasty about putting up with my "down" time.  Oh, well, I guess it's just like you said, you don't want to seem discouraging or always saying, "I can't, because...", you get so sick of being sick.  And it does get depressing, and it just plain stinks.

I actually got so down, my husband suggested I go visit my brother in Fort Myers, so I booked a reservation about 1 second after he finished speaking.  I stayed for a week, Nov. 1-7, and almost didn't want to come home.  Seriously, if my high-schooler was out of the house, I would have stayed indefinetly.  I didn't have a single migraine while I was there, I was able to sleep through the night, I felt so relaxed (what's that feeling...oh yeah, I'm not a nervous wreck).  Amazing!  Go figure!

Things are still off-track here at home, but hopefully it will work itself out.  My husband was giving me a really hard time, but he seems to have let up the last two days.  Please, let it last.  My oldest son has an attitude and a half.  Thank goodness my youngest son is doing well, and the dog still loves me :)

Also, I got diagnosed with colitis this month.  Not supposed to be under stress, the doc says.  How do you do that with migraines?  So now I am taking a steroid that causes, get this, headaches, interrupted sleep, nervousness, the whole gamut.  Though it is helping with the stomach issues, it doesn't make me fun to be around.  The headaches are definetly much worse, the migraines are about the same, though (thank goodness for the little things in life).

So thrilled to hear you had 20 migraine free days.  Congratulations!  Too bad the beer thing didn't work out--before I finished reading your paragraph about it not lasting I was ready to drive to the nearest packie!  Still...maybe it does work for part of the month--that alone would be worth indulging.  If you try it again, and get the same results, let me know--I'm in :)

What are you up to for Thanksgiving?  I was supposed to go to my sister-in-laws, she usually has it, but I'm cancelling out this year.  I just don't have the emotional or physical energy to make the 1 1/2 hour drive each way, and put up with the migraine that usually goes with it.  Plus, of course, all the women spend two hours on clean up in the kitchen after the meal while all the guys watch TV, and truthfully, I feel resentful about it already.  I'll just do it all myself at home, and my husband and sons can all pitch in on clean-up.  No travel, no aggravation, and, hopefully...less chance of a full-blown migraine.

That's the plan, anyway.

If we don't talk in the meantime, have a wonderful Thanksgiving.  Hope yours is migraine-free, and the knee pain abates a bit.  Can't believe it's both now--how are you going to keep up your tap-dancing career? :)

Take care,

Susan