Anyone else not able to work due to migraines and other related health issues?

Hello migraine community,

I guess I'm appealing to those who have been unable to work with migraine disease.  I completely dread the "So what do you do?" questions, and also the (by those who haven't seen me in years) "How's work at the college?" questions.  So much of our culture, and us as people, are "what we do".  So what happens when we can't do?  The old, "I'm not working now", "I'm unable to work now", "I'm a trophy wife" ...just kidding here  :)  don't work, and invite more questions--I guess I'm just embarassed by.  I don't know why I am so uncomfortable admitting to this illness, this frailty (maybe I see it as a failing?  aren't we supposed to overcome illness and get better?  It seems to be expected, or was in my family--you kept going on even if you were sick, no matter what). 

The fact is, the last few years have been a black hole for me.  Haven't worked.  Haven't done anything new.  Haven't had much fun at all (except what I can tweak out of those all-to-brief, less-painful, somewhat-functioning, brief moments in time that I cannot forsee, or predict, but just hope for).  I have been in pain, gone to a myriad of appointments involving all kinds of tests, traditional and alternative therapy, mostly extremely painful and non-helpful, and, at this point in time, I am so limited in what I can do.  I stay home, mostly (carefully managing meds to avoid rebound), dreading the days I have to stay off meds (means unbearable pain and even more limitation).  When I do get out, it's usually to play catch-up--groceries, drug store, various errands, etc.  An occasional lunch or dinner out is such a treat.

I have the disease no one can see.  The potential "silent killer"--it does produce changes in the brain over time, leading to goodness knows what eventually.  I mean especially silent because unless we complain out loud, everyone thinks we're fine and dandy.  And who wants to be known as a complainer?  I guess when people ask questions about what I do, I especially don't want to sound like a whiner (remember the characters from Saturday Night Live?)  I know the constant pain has interferred with how quickly and efficiently I can think things through, I joke about having senior moments (I'm 48), but my brain seems to be working on overload a lot (in dealing with all this pain and stress) and something has to go...

I've been out of work as a college professor since 2005 due to a 2004 car accident (officially given a leave for one year to recuperate, then couldn't go back to work at that time so I was let go).  Before the car accident, I had manageable migraines, a few a month.  My meds helped, and I lived a "normal" life: was able to participate in my family life, activities I enjoyed, work I enjoyed and was committed to, exercise, volunteer work, etc.  Then after the car accident, a neck injury sent my mangeable migraines into overdrive, then overkill.  The neck pain is constant, along with neurological complications.