Migraine and Headache Awareness Month #27 "Goosefrabba"
The topic of today’s Migraine and Headache Awareness Month blog challenge post is: constructively dealing with anger and resentment that pops up as a result of living with Migraine.
In the movie, Anger Management, Jack Nicholson’s character is a psychiatrist who teaches his patients to use the calming word “Goosefrabba” to control their anger.
I have no such word, phrase, or anything else I’m afraid.
I’m lucky. I don’t get angry very often. When I do get mad, I’m a passionate person. If I’m angry, it’s for a really good reason, because most everything else falls around me like water off a duck’s back.
I once took a psychological test that showed I had an extremely high affinity for justice and fairness, so those are the things that are most likely to get me going. When you’re chronically ill, there’s plenty of injustice and unfairness in the world. These are very good reasons for anger I think.
Being angry isn’t the bad thing it’s often made out to be… it’s what you do with that anger that makes the difference. I think anger should result in something positive and is not a reason to act out in a negative way. Being able to justify my anger at a situation does not help me calm myself and move past whatever is happening though, because that strong sense of justice and fairness appears and gets me all goofed up.
Sometimes, when the situation is necessary, I’ve used that anger to create positive things, like righting a wrong, or balancing the scales of justice. Sometimes simply comforting another patient when I can’t make it right, is enough to at least make me feel as though I didn’t walk away from a situation that shouldn’t be ignored.
Thankfully, it can pay to have a bad memory where anger is concerned. I honestly try really hard to move forward in a constructive manner. I ask myself “What purpose does this (anger) serve?” If the answer is “none,” then it’s time to move forward and let the past go. Forget whatever I’m upset about. That’s hard to do.
Forgiveness is something that helps me deal with anger issues as a chronic Migraine patient. I learned a long time ago that forgiveness isn’t so much for the person who did you wrong, but it is a way for you to release the power they have over you to make you angry.
Sometimes it’s soooo very hard. I even take a controversial view that forgiveness is a process, not a single act.
What do you think? How do you deal with anger in a situation where chronic illness is constantly pointing out the negatives in our life? Post a comment below, and share with us.
June 2013, Migraine and Headache Awareness Month, is dedicated to Unmasking the Mystery of Chronic Headache Disorders. The 2013 Migraine and Headache Awareness Month Blog Challenge is a project of FightingHeadacheDisorders.com.
Live your best life,
© Ellen Schnakenberg, 2013.
Last updated June 27, 2013.