Who isn't instantly hopeful when they hear of the migraine/PFO link? We run to our doctors, demanding tests. You either have it, or you don't...And if you do, you're forced to reconsider many personal positions on yourself with your migraines.
It's been a long year, punctuated by visits to my specialist and drug changes, and ever-present migraine suffering. Discovery of my PFO warranted both fear and a desire to act, and act quickly since my PFO size seemed to infect even my specialist with some kind of fear, and that quirky, nerdy scientific awe that many experience upon noting an physical anomaly. The moment my PFO betrayed its nature to the dopplar, there was a moment of uncomfortable silence and then something akin to "EUREKA! We've GOT ONE!" in the room. Hey man, just doing my part to help, or something...
Unfortunately, we've come to find that acting quickly on a PFO defect is not possible when you have migraine. It takes more time and energy and willpower to make things happen, more than you'd think you're willing to extend to the process. But I have also found the will within me to do many things I wouldn't have thought possible because I have found people that feel as I do and who actively support one another. I've also shared my experiences with family and friends, to the point that they are quite possibly sick of my migraines, but they've extended kindness and curiousity and support to myself and my family as we made the decision to be a part of one of many PFO/migraine trials now active around the United States.
Honestly, the procedure was easier than I imagined it would be. We're always afraid of the unknown but given a choice I would go back and do it again in a heartbeat. I may or may not have received the device and only time will tell. But this has made me a bigger, stronger person. It's showed me that I can erase my own perceptions of myself and in place, put in someone else who is willing to fight for her voice and the voices of others like her to be heard, and not the least of all because she's got others that are willing to do the same for her.
A year's time will tell if I got the device or not. But for now, all I can do is relax, take my medications, and keep up with my electronic diary. I'm sure I'll still have attacks. But I'll stay positive that this is all going according to plan and as soon as I can (which is all but immediate!) I promise to begin to take care of myself more. It's been a year of desperation but I am thankful that some of the worry has been taken out of my hands for the time being while we wait for results of the study.
