Monday, May 28, 2012
Tuesday, July 08, 2008 Steve Coyle asks

Q: What can a loved one do to help the sufferer ? Steve Coyle

Answer This
Answers (3)
Nancy Harris Bonk, Health Guide
7/11/08 10:59am

Hi Steve,

 

One of the best things you have done is coming here and asking this very question. Being involved in a Migraineurs health care is very important because Migraine disease takes its toll on the entire family.

 

Learning all you can about Migraine is a start, and Anatomy of a Migraine may help. I don't think people, who haven't experienced a Migraine attack, completey understand how debilitating they can be. Many of the Migraineurs I speak with talk about how difficult it is to cope with those close to them not comprehending this disease. Being your loved one's champion can be one of the best things you can do for them. When family and friends complain "oh, she/he has a 'headache' again" calmly tell them it is not just a headache but a Migraine, a genetic neurologic condition currently without a cure.  This article: Migraine and Headache Education for Those Who "Don't Get It" sums things us nicely.

 

Since Migraine is an invisiable disease it makes it difficult for others to "get it".  We have information on invisiable illness HERE.

 

 

Attend a doctors visit them. Some doctors (sad but true) will acutally give more validation to the Migraineur whose partner, spouse, friend, or whomever attend appointments with them, because the pain must be "real" if others are on board with the patient too. Take notes with them, we may miss some key points the doctor says. Ask questions - my husband always feels free to interject when he feels the need during a doctors visit.

 

Join our discussion forum. Your loved one can sign up and get lots of support from other Migraineurs. This is vital so they won't feel so alone. They can get there  by clicking HERE. Steve, just as important as helping your loved, taking care of yourself is imperative. Caretakers often overlook themselves and get worn down. We have a new foler on the forum, For Significant Others Only (SOO) where you can go and get support. We're hoping other SOO start using the folder becasue it can be a great resource for caretakers without your loved one "seeing" what's going on.

I hope this information helps, please let me know if I can be of further assistance.

Good luck

Nancy 

 

 

 

 

Reply
7/ 8/08 11:23pm

The best thing that you can do is listen. One of the hardest parts of my life with migraines is feeling that no one understands. My boyfriend does a very good job of making me feel that he does...even though I know he can't completey know my pain. He is also really supportive. I can't eat out Outback. I don't know what they do to their food but it gives me bad migraines. So he no longer eats there anymore either, even though it's one of his favorite places. I

 

if you really want to go the extra mile - do some research on the disease, treatments, and other options. That way you can talk to your loved one on another level than someone who is just listening and telling them that it will be o.k.

 

You can also be there with an icepack or anything else that you know sooths a headache. Hope some of these suggestions were helpful. I think sometimes you just have to deal with the pain on your own, but it's great to have people in your life who want to help too

Reply
7/ 9/08 8:39pm

As a sufferer, the best thing my family and friends do is accept and understand the fact that I can be in pain at anytime anywhere.   That's about all you can do, understand your sufferer can't help it, can't control it and when you have to change plans because an attack happens, smile and softly say no problem.

 

 

Reply
Answer This

Important:
We hope you find this general health information helpful. Please note however, that this Q&A is meant to support not replace the professional medical advice you receive from your doctor. No information in the Answers above is intended to diagnose or treat any condition. The views expressed in the Answers above belong to the individuals who posted them and do not necessarily reflect the views of Remedy Health Media. Remedy Health Media does not review or edit content posted by our community members, but reserves the right to remove any material it deems inappropriate.

By Steve Coyle— Last Modified: 12/26/10, First Published: 07/08/08