Do you Facebook? Sounds like a silly question right? It seems like most everyone uses the social media site to stay in touch with friends and family. Heck, I graduated from high school 20 years ago, and even my 10th grade English teacher found me and now we are “friends.” Really, that is pretty cool.
I enjoy catching up on the activities and goings-on of all my friends, but this morning Facebook brought up some feelings in me that I don’t want to acknowledge having.
It made me sad.
Maybe it’s just the way I’m feeling today or because I’m feeling holiday stress or am feeling sleep deprived—after all, Dan and I were at an MS holiday party and stayed up a little late last night. But I think there’s something else.
I cannot believe I’m admitting this, but I feel jealous, angry and, like I said earlier, sad. It’s the reality that, unlike many related posts on Facebook, I don’t have kids, haven’t run a marathon, taken a luxurious cruise on the Mediterranean, or some other fabulousness.
Deep down I want to blame my multiple sclerosis for limiting me from doing some of those activities. Living with MS has changed me and my ability, that’s a fact.
And yes, I can hear many of you shouting, “You still can do x, y, or z,” or “Stop wasting your time on these thoughts!” or “Focus on the positive things, not the negative,” and probably some other strong statements like that.
Stay positive? I get that. When all is said and done, I will find my way there. But today, I want to be sad.
Is this kind of thinking so bad? After all, don’t I—or anyone else, really—deserve to have a down day from time to time? Can’t these kinds of thoughts be beneficial now and again?
So with all this, let me ask you these two questions (and be honest in your responses): Do you ever indulge in the occasional pity party? And if so, what thoughts or activities help to snap you out of it?