So hard to maintain a positive attitude

Pam, This is smomdukes, I am there with you and beyond.  You have every right to feel the way that you feel, it is your right.  Let me tell you the story of ME.  I am now 52, hey I look good for my age, my pops always said, "it is a poor frog that does not praise his own pond".  But anyway, you are feeling the wrath of the Monster.  Let's just face facts it does not get any better.  I was told when MS decided to show up at the ripe age of 44 that I had, had MS all of my life.  Looking back, the signs were there all along the way, but by no one in my familoy having MS nor having a history of MS no one thought to look for MS, so guess what "tag I was it"  I had a career, I wore 3 inch heels everyday to work, looked good, (still do)  got around better than a 20 year old, worked 10 hours a day and went to school at night, almost finished, except I refuse to take Finite Math, just cannot do it, not gonna do it!  MS has come in and wreaked havoc on all of our lives, taken away our independence, and I was totally independent, but now I no longer work.  I have applied for disability, I know that I am going to have to wait, that is just the way it is, the system is flawed that way.  I am also plaqued with fatique, I do all right in the morning, the afternoons is a wrap.  So I have learned to plan my day, as you will also.  This way of life is not so bad, we just have to adjust, and you know what, everyone has to, even those who are not ill, they have to adjust.  Life will be fine challenging but fine.  There are going to be some trying time ahead, I am not going to lie, but you will adjust.  Be patient with yourself, all is not lost, it never is.  Take care.  sherry/smomdukes

MomDukes,

You truly have a gift.  

You have a way of saying, "It is what it is, and it sucks, but oh well."  Not in a flippant way, but in a grudgingly accepting way.  I like it.  It always makes me feel better.  I like the way you make me feel that it's ok to be pissed and crabby about the whole thing, but it's not ok to wallow in all of that. 

I know I'm probably not being real clear in what I mean by that, but I just wanted to say I appreciate your candor and that you really do have a way of making me feel as if I'm not wrong in feeling the way I do and, at the same time, giving me the kick in the butt I need to walk away from the pity party I've been on the verge of throwing and get on with my life.

I hope that made sense.  Thanks for being you. :)

--Pam

Helen,

Thanks so much for your response.  I admire the way that you've chosen to be your own advocate and be proactive.

I'm going to read up on LDN.  I gave myslef my first Copaxone injection today and had a long talk with the RN that was here to get me started.  She also told me a lot of ways to deal with the fatigue, spasticity, depression, pain, incontinence, etc. 

I'm going to give the Copaxone a chance to help.  I'm hoping I do get some measure of relief simply because it should help the inflamation in the nerves in my brain and spine.  I'm going to do my best to have a positive attitude about it while still exploring other avenues of treatment.

I wish you much luck with the LDN and I look forward to hearing how that's going for you.

--Pam 

That's great Pam.  In am glad to hear that your spirit s lifted a bit. I believe a positive,even proactive, approach helps when the blue bug comes.  Good luck with your treatment.  I sincerely hope for the best possble results.  Helen